betrayed desires

2011 in review

2011-12-31T04:23:00.003-05:00

Well it appears as though I havent posted in this blog since my last years review..... I cant give up this one yearly tradition i have! Does that sentence even make sense? Probably not. English grammar and vocabulary start to shrivel when you are surrounded by non-native speakers. I'd give a link to last years post, but it seems a bit unnecessary.

1. What did you do in 2011 that you’d never done before?
Planted / cultivated a rooftop vegetable garden. Cat-sat. Nothing crazy exciting I guess.

2. Did you keep your new year’s resolutions, and will you make more for next year?
My resolutions for 2011 were: keep learning Dutch (be able to hold small conversations); make significant dents in paying off my credit cards (paid one off this year!); better manage my time so I can relax/exercise too.

And i really didnt keep them and that is a shame. PhD sorta gets in the way of everything else.

3. Did anyone close to you give birth?
Ummm no i dont believe so. But there will be soooo many in 2012!

4. Did anyone close to you die?
Yes, my Gramma died (mom's mom). We were quite close. She was pretty miserable and wanted to die, but I still would have liked to see her one last time. And I really wanted her to meet Jamie. She died ~3 weeks before we went to the States for Thanksgiving.

5. What countries did you visit?
New countries that I had never been to before: Switzerland.

Countries that I have been to before: England, Belgium, France, USA.

6. What would you like to have in 2012 that you lacked in 2011?
Same as last year: A first author scientific publication.

7. What dates from 2011 will remain etched upon your memory, and why?
I'm really bad at remembering actual dates, but I can remember events that happen on specific days. The ones that stand out are the first beautiful day in Interlaken, seeing the sunset at the top of the Eiffel Tower with Jamie, and the death of my Gramma.

8. What was your biggest achievement of the year?
Same as last year: Not quitting my PhD - ie surviving 2011.

9. What was your biggest failure?
Not sure

10. Did you suffer illness or injury?
Oh yes... New years day ~2 am slipped and fell on ice walking home from NYE party and tore ankle ligament... a week or so later fell again and tore the ligament on the other side of the same ankle. Not a great way to start the year.

11. What was the best thing you bought?
Plants and seeds for our garden. Our couch.

12. Whose behavior merited celebration?
Jamie for being awesome and taking care of me during my hellish PhD. Knitting friends who welcome me back after long absences each time i try to have a social life.

13. Whose behavior made you appalled and depressed?
The new manager/realtor of the flat I live in for charging Jamie an arm and a leg for rent just b/c he can (even though I pay much less for the same size room).

14. Where did most of your money go?
Rent, new couch, traveling, beer, yarn.

15. What did you get really, really, really excited about?
Seeing my family again after 2 years. Greenfield music festival (Foo Fighters! Apocalyptica! System of a Down! Frank Turner! Volbeat! Social Distortion!). The International Burlesque Circus here in Utrecht.

16. What song(s) will always remind you of 2011?
Anything by Frank Turner or Volbeat

17. Compared to this time last year, are you: a) happier or sadder?  b) thinner or fatter?  c) richer or poorer?
Happier, fatter, tad richer.

18. What do you wish you’d done more of?
Exercise. Sleep.

19. What do you wish you’d done less of?
Worry about my PhD.

20. How did you spend Christmas?
We spent Christmas and Boxing Day with Jamie's family in Stevenage, England again. AND we spent Thanksgiving with my family in Orland Park, IL!

21. Did you fall in love in 2011?
I stayed in love (:

23. What was your favorite TV program?
New ones this year were: Game of Thrones (oh the LOVE) and Grimm. And we have our TV staples: Doctor Who, True Blood, Big Bang Theory, Walking Dead, How I Met Your Mother, any nature program narrated by David Attenborough.

24. Do you hate anyone now that you didn’t hate this time last year?
I sometimes hate my PhD supervisors. This week wasn't a particularly good one, so I'm def not liking them right now.

25. What was the best book you read?
I actually finished some books this summer - i re-read all of Song of Ice and Fire in preparation for Dance With Dragons which was, as expected, so awesome.

26. What was your greatest musical discovery?
Frank Turner and Volbeat

27. What did you want and get?
A new couch.

28. What did you want and not get?
A travel grant to the International Pneumococcal Congress in 2012 in Brazil.

29. What was your favorite film of this year?
hmmmmm. I'm terrible at remembering what we saw this year and not other years. Maybe the Muppets?

30. What did you do on your birthday, and how old were you?
I was 29. I wasnt feeling very social so it was a private dinner with just Jamie. I actually dont even remember it.

31. What one thing would have made your year immeasurably more satisfying?
Same as last year: A magical understanding of the Dutch language. More contact with the people, friends and family, I left in the States.

32. How would you describe your personal fashion concept in 2009?
Mostly the same as previous years - whatever doesnt make me look pudgy and lots of black with a creeping towards a bit of "Dutch" and "European" fashion.

33. What kept you sane?
My office-mates and my boyfriend.

34. Which celebrity/public figure did you fancy the most?
I read Dan Savage weekly - he's a mini celebrity, right?

35. What political issue stirred you the most?
Same as last year: Marriage equality - no reason the States should discriminate. Immigration rights.

36. Who did you miss?
My friends who are not in the same country as me. My Grampa and Gramma.

37. Who was the best new person you met? Why?
Umm i'm not sure I met any new people?

38. Tell us a valuable life lesson you learned in 2011.
Don't put carrot seeds too close together in pots.

39. A Quote or song lyric that sums up your year.

to the east, to east, the road beneath my feet

to the west to the west, but i haven't got there yet

to the north to the north, never to be caught

and to the south to the south, my time is running out

.....

i face the horizon, every where that i go

i face the horizon, the horizon is my home

from The Road by Frank Turner

2010 summary

2010-12-30T08:00:00.002-05:00

It's that time again- time for the annual year-wrap-up blog post. One of the Only things I am decently good at doing every year on time. (: Here is the link to last years post, which gives further links to 2008 and 2007. Hard to believe I've been blogging that long.

1. What did you do in 2010 that you’d never done before?
Went kayaking. Went to a European music festival (involving multiple days and camping). Hosted/cooked a proper Thanksgiving dinner outside of the USA. Spent Christmas with someone else's family. One thing that was done to me and not by me was I was robbed - my purse was stolen. I'd never before been a direct victim of crime ):

2. Did you keep your new year’s resolutions, and will you make more for next year?
Okay so I did fairly well on my resolutions for last year. I sadly did not finish learning Dutch. BUT I did find my equilibrium here and regained joy in my life and stopped complaining so much about being single. it especially helped that I'm no longer single though, so I guess I cant count that one.
My resolutions for 2011 are: keep learning Dutch (be able to hold small conversations); make significant dents in paying off my credit cards (paid one off this year!); better manage my time so I can relax/exercise too.

3. Did anyone close to you give birth?
Nope, no births this year. But there were several weddings.

4. Did anyone close to you die?
I wasnt too close with my uncle Steve, but he did die suddenly. Also, my dad's mom died.

5. What countries did you visit?
Israel and Czech Republic!

6. What would you like to have in 2011 that you lacked in 2010?
A first author scientific publication.

7. What dates from 2010 will remain etched upon your memory, and why?
The day Jamie moved in with me is the only one I can think of right now.

8. What was your biggest achievement of the year?
Not quitting my PhD - ie surviving 2010.

9. What was your biggest failure?
Again - I finished knitting a couple things I have not yet seamed..... Oh well, maybe next year?

10. Did you suffer illness or injury?
Again yes. Haven't been sick as much this year as last but I do seem to be very good at injuring myself. Nothing that has required hospital visits though. On Christmas eve I slipped and fell on ice and smacked my face on the ground/ice - my glasses cut me and gave me a black eye - it's still all nasty and ouchy.

11. What was the best thing you bought?
New bed and furniture. Mucha posters. My awesome camera that I owned for just 3 months before it was stolen with my purse. My new tattoo.

12. Whose behavior merited celebration?
My office-mates for tolerating each others idiosyncrasies and for supporting/helping me when I was ready to give up and quit. Jamie for taking care of me when I work 10-12 hour days 60 days in a row.

13. Whose behavior made you appalled and depressed?
The owner of the flat I lived in over the summer - refused to give me my deposit back just for the hell of it b/c he can. The person who stole my Purse in Prague. The police lady in Prague that yelled at me for being a stupid tourist and being at fault for my bag being stolen.

14. Where did most of your money go?
Moving. Rent. Getting my ID cards re-issued after the theft (thanks stingy Dutch govt).

15. What did you get really, really, really excited about?
Seeing the Bruins in Prague (which i didnt get to thanks to the purse-snatcher). Jamie coming back from his world tour to visit me.

16. What song(s) will always remind you of 2010?
Soon by Triggerfinger. Teenage Dream by Katy Perry. Billionaire by Travie McCoy and Bruno Mars.

17. Compared to this time last year, are you: a) happier or sadder?  b) thinner or fatter?  c) richer or poorer?
Happier, fatter, tad richer.

18. What do you wish you’d done more of?
Exercise.

19. What do you wish you’d done less of?
Cry over failed experiments.

20. How will you be spending Christmas?
For the first time ever I was away from my parents and family. I spent Christmas and Boxing Day with Jamie's family in Stevenage, England.

21. Did you fall in love in 2010?
I did, actually. I fell in Love with a guy I'd met during the great Eurocrazy tour of 2008 and he became the most amazing, sweet, awesome boyfriend ever.

23. What was your favorite TV program?
True Blood def was a major new thing for me. Big Bang Theory, How not to live your life, and Walking Dead are all enjoyable to watch too.

24. Do you hate anyone now that you didn’t hate this time last year?
Sure, the person(s) that stole my purse!

25. What was the best book you read?
oooh, thats a bit tough considering I started a bunch and finished none. Too much PhD reading going on.

26. What was your greatest musical discovery?
I rediscovered a love of Rammstein after seeing them live; I guess I now take pleasure in listening to Katy Perry (but only b/c Jamie sings the songs to me); and I really like Bruno Mars and I had never heard of him before.

27. What did you want and get?
A significant other. A place to call home (ie: a place to live in Utrecht that's not temporary).

28. What did you want and not get?
Oh hundreds of things went wrong in the lab.....

29. What was your favorite film of this year?
hmmmmm. tough one. Probably Machete

30. What did you do on your birthday, and how old were you?
I was 28. I had some friends over for beer and cake. it was nice.

31. What one thing would have made your year immeasurably more satisfying?
A magical understanding of the Dutch language. More contact with the people, freinds and family, I left in the States.

32. How would you describe your personal fashion concept in 2009?
Mostly the same as previous years - whatever doesnt make me look pudgy and lots of black with a creeping towards a bit of "Dutch" and "European" fashion.

33. What kept you sane?
My office-mates and my boyfriend.

34. Which celebrity/public figure did you fancy the most?
I read Dan Savage weekly - he's a mini celebrity, right?

35. What political issue stirred you the most?
Same as last year: Marriage equality - no reason the States should discriminate. Immigration rights.

36. Who did you miss?
My friends who are not in the same country as me. My Grampa. Jamie while he was in Canada and USA.

37. Who was the best new person you met? Why?
I havent met very many people this year compared to last year, or at least, Ive met so many new people the past 1.5 years I cant really remember who was in 2009 and 2010....

38. Tell us a valuable life lesson you learned in 2010.
Some people are jerks and criminals, always be vigilant in foreign cities (i should have known that one already but I lapsed).

39. A Quote that sums up your year.
"With all its sham, drudgery, and broken dreams, it is still a beautiful world. Be cheerful. Strive to be happy." Max Ehrmann, 1927.

Desiderata

2010-07-12T07:30:00.003-04:00

This poem is on a poster in the WC of my new flat (yes with the erroneous 1692 citation) and it has become my new favortie poem. I felt that it should be shared with everyone (if anyone still reads this blog). It's all good advice but the beauty of poetry is to make the words more meaningful through their flow and construction into a poem. Sometimes I forget how much I love poetry. Makes me miss all my books in storage in Illinois. Anyway, enough of my blabbing!

Desiderata

Go placidly amid the noise and haste,
and remember what peace there may be in silence.
As far as possible without surrender
be on good terms with all persons.
Speak your truth quietly and clearly;
and listen to others,
even the dull and the ignorant;
they too have their story.

Avoid loud and aggressive persons,
they are vexations to the spirit.
If you compare yourself with others,
you may become vain and bitter;
for always there will be greater and lesser persons than yourself.
Enjoy your achievements as well as your plans.

Keep interested in your own career, however humble;
it is a real possession in the changing fortunes of time.
Exercise caution in your business affairs;
for the world is full of trickery.
But let this not blind you to what virtue there is;
many persons strive for high ideals;
and everywhere life is full of heroism.

Be yourself.
Especially, do not feign affection.
Neither be cynical about love;
for in the face of all aridity and disenchantment
it is as perennial as the grass.

Take kindly the counsel of the years,
gracefully surrendering the things of youth.
Nurture strength of spirit to shield you in sudden misfortune.
But do not distress yourself with dark imaginings.
Many fears are born of fatigue and loneliness.
Beyond a wholesome discipline,
be gentle with yourself.

You are a child of the universe,
no less than the trees and the stars;
you have a right to be here.
And whether or not it is clear to you,
no doubt the universe is unfolding as it should.

Therefore be at peace with God,
whatever you conceive Him to be,
and whatever your labors and aspirations,
in the noisy confusion of life keep peace with your soul.

With all its sham, drudgery, and broken dreams,
it is still a beautiful world.
Be cheerful.
Strive to be happy.

Max Ehrmann, 1927.

one year in Holland

2010-06-27T17:08:00.003-04:00

Well life has been really crazy lately (when is it not?) and I havent had time to do much of anything, or rather, I do the things that seem important and then i'm so tired I leave off the others. So updating my Project 365 page has halted as has updating this blog. I did, however, want to make a quick mention that I've passed over my 1 year anniversary of living in Europe, and I didnt even realize it! So, happy anniversary to me, and to Europe. It's been a crazy year. Lots of good, lots of bad, lots of life. Even though I still cant seem to shake my bad luck in Holland, I'm glad I'm here. No really, I am (: It's been a tough year, but I hope that after I move into my new flat next week that everything will return to "normal." And maybe I'll even get a chance to start blogging again. And most importantly, when I finish moving house so much (5 times in 1 year is enough!) I hope to get back to roaming around Europe. The travel bug has bitten me again and I've got an itch. (Ew that sounds gross)

1 year down, 3 to go!

woe

2010-05-16T14:55:00.002-04:00

I get paid this friday (hooray!) and the first thing I'm going to buy (ok, maybe 2nd, after a beer) is a new camera. After having at least one, all my life, I'm going crazy without one! And no, the camera on my mobile phone does not count!

On a separate note, if you want a good cry, read the LJ blog of this Canadian girl who died of CF at 25. I found it via an article on CNN. Sometimes CNN has decent stories. Sometimes. It reminds me of how lucky I am, even with my own problems with my own chronic diseases. Having known (and dated actually) someone with CF, it hit close to home. I do not even want to imagine how I will be if/when he dies. As much as my own life has sucked thanks to migraines and diabetes, I am so grateful that I can run, bike, hike etc (albeit slowly) whenever I want without worrying about drowning in my own mucous. Dear human people: dont ever take your healthy body for granted! (smokers, i'm thinking of you, you bastards) Go out and live life, love life! Find joy. I'm not saying be happy all the time (no one can really), but dont take anything for granted.

Fun picture blogging shall hopefully return after the purchase of a new camera. I suppose this could have been a good opportunity to blog about all the other pictures I've taken and not shared, but I'm lazy. (: And busy living the life of a PhD student.

outtakes 365 project

2010-03-08T16:22:00.004-05:00

Here are more pictures not chosen for my official picture of the day. It's been a while since I posted 365 pictures, so there was a lot to choose from.

Feb 22 - I pressed the buttons, but the elevator never went anywhere. Maybe this is a mirage and there isnt an elevator in the bike garage (;

Feb 26 - Love Potion. Drinking with co-workers. Hmmmm

March 2 - Opening act for 30 Seconds to Mars. Shame we got there at the end; they were really good. See the guy with the bat? He was playing the drum set with the bat! Crazy

March 6: My favorite Saturday treat: Bram Frites met fritesauce! My favorite. mmmmm now I want some. nom nom

Little chicks in the Hema!

Ran into co-workers / friends Sue and Marieke. Marieke needed books to read for her impromptu holiday in Egypt. SO we popped into a used book store that I didnt know was a used bookstore. I LOVE used bookstores! It even had English books (these are not in English). Now I have to forget I know about this place before I blow all my monies!

Beautiful old books in a foreign language

March 7 - New lesson : blue skies + green sadly does not = spring

Quiz time

2010-03-01T16:45:00.003-05:00

Just got back from Dutch lessons and biking at night wakes me up so I need something to calm me down before I go to bed. So here's a quiz/questionaire stolen from Amanda.

1) What would you call yourself if you could choose your own name? I actually love my name, I just wish my family would call me by my full name (Cassandra) and not the short version (Cassie).

2) What was your worst date (as in going out on a date, not an actual calendar date…unless you have a really bad one to share)? Hmmmmm. Worst date. Man there have been a lot of bad ones and laughable ones. I've had so many first dates I dont even remember them all. Off the top of my head is a guy I met through an internet date site. First, he didnt look like his picture (they never do). He did bring me a rose, but it looked like he swiped it from a bouquet at the grocery store and didnt actually pay for it or anything. We went to a pub that was jam packed and we couldnt get a table for food, so after a couple beers we left. We went down the block to a restaurant for food. The food was good but by then I had waited so long for it that I had a headache and I was nauseous and could barely force it down. While we were waiting for the food and talking he started singing a Tool song in an acapella voice. Really loud. It was embarrassing. Then on the T ride (subway in Boston) home he tried to kiss me. Not a good idea since the T has a habit of stopping abruptly or lurching forward. I think I got off the T at my stop and he didnt. He called and e-mailed a couple times and I tried to tell him it wasnt going to work but he didnt take no for an answer initially. The singing part is the part that stand out. It was a quiet, upscale restaurant. I'm not a fan of being serenaded with acapella versions of metal songs in upscale restaurants....

3) If you had to teach one subject in high school or college, what would it be? Biology for sure!

4) When was the last time you laughed so hard you cried? The other day at home alone watching TV. Some commercial reminded me of something and I just couldnt stop laughing. I might not be sane.

5) What is the kindest thing anyone has ever done for you? Hmmm. Again, tough choice. A Lot of people have done kind things for me over the years. My best friend Anne and her husband have driven up to Boston from Connecticut (~100 miles) to help me move on several occasions - in Boston this usually involves carrying everything down 3 flights of twisty stairs then up 3 flights. I always lived on 3rd floors. This past winter a co-worker drove me to the airport when there was so much snow that the trains and the buses werent running and the roads were dangerous. It involved an overnight stay and his boyfriend cooked us a wonderful meal.

6) If money or skill-set was no issue, what would you love to do for a living? I think I'd still be a scientist. Maybe a nature photographer or a ceramicist.

7) What is one thing as an adult/parent/spouse you do that you swore you would never do? Well I'm not a spouse or a parent and I cant really think of anything that I do as an adult that I'd swore i'd never do as a child. I think this question applies more to parents.

8) If you could go back to one particular time in your life (not to live, not to change anything, just to visit) when would it be? When I was a toddler and learning to read. Apparently I taught myself to read (with Mom's help) at the age of 3 and I was quite the bright and inquisitive child. I've never lost my curiosity, but I'd love to see what I was like when I discovered (quite possibly) the most important skill of my entire life. And my most cherished.

9) If your walls could talk, what would they say about you (good & bad)? They would say that I'm sad and depressed and lonely and I need to clean my apartment more often and get out more often. They would also say I waste far too much time on the internet. Oh and they might have a good laugh about how often I dance in my underwear or naked to music.

10) If you could fix or put an end to one problem in the world what would it be? I agree with Amanda on this one: Wastefulness. Lets not ruin our beautiful planet.

Expat life

2010-02-21T13:39:00.008-05:00

Posting more pictures that didnt make it onto the official 365 Project as my picture of the day. Might actually make this a weekly event. It's keeping me more active in blogging than ever before. So if I have the time, I'll try every Sunday.

Not entirely sure when I took this picture on my mobile phone, but I just learned how to download picts from my mobile onto my computer this week. They are glass plate spreaders I made by melting glass in a bunsen burner flame. I'd never done this before so they are a bit uneven. Ah well, it was fun.

Feb 14: Sunday morning coffee with my new china set from the Hema. I bought this with my giftcard from the University as my Christmas present to myself. Totally fell in love with this pattern. Wish I could afford the entire set of dishes.

Sepia version

An egg boiling in water. Thought the ripples in the water were cool.

Feb 15: Bunnies at night with Lazer Eyes. They always come out at night! There are bunches of them living near the bushes around the infection unit.

Feb 18: Lichen on the Vet School. Another shot taken with my mobile phone.

Feb 21: Fog in the morning. Woke up to a world hiding in fog.

Also, a note on trying to focus on the positive aspects of being an expat: it's not easy when the citizens of the country you live in dislike immigrants. The overt racism and poor treatment of non-Dutch people really really bothers me. I wish I could let it go or let it roll off my back and not bother me, but I cant. Last night I was with a couple other expats and we waited in line to get into this restaurant/bar that has dancing at night in Utrecht (called Havana Club - the food is not Cuban but they try) and we were denied admission b/c none of us were Dutch. I'm pretty sure this is illegal. I may have gotten all angry-obnoxious-drunk american and yelled some not nice things at the bouncers.... I shouldnt have done that but I was so angry. We were dressed properly and we were a bunch of good looking people and this is Utrecht! Not effing New York city or LA. This was not an issue of us not fitting in with the beautiful people. This was us being blatantly discriminated against b/c only one of us spoke Dutch (not me). I've heard stories of Moroccan or African or people looking like they are Moroccan or African getting rejected from clubs, but I never heard of people being rejected just for being foreigners. And I'm a legal effing resident. I pay their high taxes just like everyone else. I was quite upset over this so I ended up just going home.
On my bike ride home a vehicle driving behind me started beeping and the driver yelling at me so I waved at it to pass. It didnt pass, it just kept beeping. Since I was already quite angry I did another typical American thing and pulled my bike over and flipped the bird at the driver. So the guy pulled up next to me and started shouting at me in Dutch. I yelled back "Het spijt me, ik spreekt geen Nederlands, spreekt u Engels?" (i'm sorry, i dont speak Dutch, do you speak English?) And then he shouted at me something about being an ignorant foreigner and not knowing the language who bikes too slow and i'm rude and something about arresting me. I shouted back that I'm a kennismigrant and therefore not required to learn Dutch. There was more arguing about me not being able to speak Dutch and he kept saying something about having me arrested if i didnt calm down. Eventually I just said i'm sorry ive had a bad night you're right. And he drove off. In my drunkenness I thought he might have been the police b/c the van looked like a police van. But he was not. I cried the entire bike ride home. Like hysterical crying. I'm surprised I didnt crash my bike - I was basically biking without seeing anything.

Ive spent the entire day today annoyed at myself and annoyed at the people in this country. Being angry and annoyed is not going to help me to adjust or have a happy life here. But at the same time if I bottle it all up inside then its just going to come bursting out like it did last night. I'm going to have to find some constructive way to deal with this.

more 365 outtakes

2010-02-14T06:50:00.004-05:00

I love my Cannon PowerShot SD700 IS Digital Elph but being a part of Project 365 has awakened the artist in me and I now want, with all my heart and soul, a digital SLR and a tripod. I blame my father for introducing me to SLR's with multiple lenses and tripods as a child. His amateur (and he's good!) photography habit really rubbed off on me. Seeing all of the amazing pictures on 365project.org makes my heart ache for a better camera. I vow to drink one less beer every week until I have one! Too bad I do not think this will happen before I go to Tel Aviv. But it is my new goal!

Oh, and here are some outtakes.

Feb 6, 2010
Found wandering Utrecht City. What are they doing to that poor boy?

Feb 6, 2010
At the Xenos.
Make sure to have all your 2-foot ducks in a row!
I should have gotten something else in the shot for size comparison.

Feb 9, 2010
Dizzy stairs at the Medical School of UMC Utrecht.

Feb 10, 2010
Ice on my office window.

365 out-takes

2010-02-04T14:22:00.002-05:00

My desire to have awesome pictures everyday for project 365 is taking up a lot of my time! Especially when i get absorbed in trying to capture something difficult. Was inspired last night by another girl's self-portrait 365 (info here and here) and a little jealous of her superior equipment and skills.
Anyway here are some outtakes from the last couple of days of pictures that didnt make the cut as "official picture of the day."

January

2010-01-31T05:02:00.003-05:00

I have had a really tough January. Possibly the worst January ever. Not a good way to start a year for sure. First, I had to leave my friends behind in New England, again, knowing that their lives are changing so rapidly I may not "know" them the next time I am able to see them. After I got back to the Netherlands I have been incredibly homesick and depressed. Then I got actually physically sick, twice. First a viral URI (possibly the flu, I thought I was dying), then a week after getting better I was socked with a bacterial sinus infection that moved into my ears. Ugh. I have not had otitis media since I was a kid. It hurts! Meanwhile all of my experiments went wrong. Either b/c i did something wrong or because of equipment that malfunctioned or parameters we were unaware of (such as European mice being colonized in their nose with bacteria of the same type that I work with) - so basically a giant waste of time and money. I've worked every weekend in Jan. I've had to cancel plans with friends new and old thanks to working weekends and being sick. A little hard to cure my loneliness and depression if I cannot even have a social life in the first place.
The icing on this shitty cake was this past friday my mom called me, my Grandma had died that day. This was my dad's mom. My dad's parents live in Texas for the winters, so no one was even down there for it. My parents and aunt were actually on their way down since we knew it was coming. She had a stroke before Christmas. The cause of the stroke was cancer on her spinal cord. She was paralyzed after the stroke. Not a good way to live life when you are that old. I spoke to her on the phone on Christmas (everyone did), so at least I got to tell her Europe was going good and so was my PhD. She was a survivor of breast cancer so it was pretty amazing that she lived this long anyway. - And I'm pretty sure it happened before I was born so that would be pre-1980's which makes her survival even more amazing. I was not as close to her as my mom's parents, but she was still a wonderful Grandma. On a side note, it's been a little over a year since my Uncle Tom died of brain cancer, so this side of the family is not having a good January for sure either. My poor Aunt, first her husband, now her mother. I hope that she is ok. It's very hard to be so far away from family and not be able to be there at times like these.

In order to get past this horrible month I have decided that tomorrow, February 1, is a new new year for me. It will be a fresh start. A better year. This January will be put behind me. From now on, things will get better. To commemorate this fresh start I've joined the 365 Project and I'll start tomorrow (you can find me here). From tomorrow onwards I'll take a picture and post it every day. I'll focus on ex-pat life and try to focus on good things. And I'll work on my photography skills. Once upon a time, I studied visual arts as my minor in high school and college and I took "old school" photography classes. I've even won awards. I really miss that connection to art - taking the picture, developing the film, deciding which pictures deserved to be printed, processing the print - i miss it all. I dont have any fancy camera equipment here, just my "point-and-shoot" digital camera, so I'm going to push that to the limit. See how far a hand-held can take me. And maybe if I have a little extra monies, I'll get myself a decent SLR, we'll see.

Hooray for tomorrow! Now, I have to get to the lab and do some work.

broken

2010-01-22T16:43:00.002-05:00

Well, I think this may be my biggest "New Year Resolutions" failure ever. It's not even the end of January and I've managed to not follow my resolutions at all. I've been rather depressed here in the Netherlands and not at all positive or trying to find equilibrium. I cant manage to stay happy here for any length of time. I've come to the conclusion that if you have problems in your life, moving to a new country does not solve them. Hard lesson, but important. I'm not giving up though, that's not me. I dont give up. I may take a negativity detour, but I dont give up. I'll keep on, eventually I'll make progress and happiness will happen. Or I'll be dead. Either way, problem solved.

To try and help myself get back on track, I'm posting my favorite picture from 2009. Oddly enough, taken here in the Netherlands. It's true, I have a love/hate relationship with this place. I hope this picture will remind me that things can be good here. And maybe I'll join that 365 thing where you take a picture every day. If I do it will be in Feb, I'm really not a start in the middle type of person. I like to start things at proper times like the beginning of the week or month.

2009 Knit FO parade

2010-01-09T18:05:00.002-05:00

Well, I managed to knit way more than I thought I did. There are a couple "Finished Objects" that I did not include b/c even though they are blocked, they arent right in some way or the other so I need to rip them out an re-start. Earlier tonight I was looking at all my stuff that I had "unpacked" or rather, taken out of my suitcases, and I was thinking of all the things I wanted to do instead of putting my stuff away. Some people like to organize and clean. I am not one of those people. I like to procrastinate. What I really wanted to do was get out a ball of yarn, wind it up, and start a project for myself. Instead, I spent nearly 2 hours making a photo collage of my finished knitted 2009 objects. Sigh, there has to be a better way to make collages than photoshop. Or I need to learn the tricks to do it quicker.

So that knitting tally is: 1 ball of yarn dyed and 20 objects: 1 baby bib, 1 pr baby booties, 1 pair wrist warmers, 2 pairs socks, 4 adult hats, 1 baby hat, 2 beer cozies, 2 stoles, 1 shawlette, 2 blankets, 3 coasters, 1 bunny toy.

2009 wrap up

2010-01-01T22:24:00.004-05:00

Wow it's already Jan 1, 2010. Figured I may as well do the year end wrap up Ive done now for the last two years. In case you want to keep track, here is 2008 and 2007. I have to admit, this year has been a bit of a blur, so there may be some things that I have forgotten!

1. What did you do in 2009 that you’d never done before?
Moved to a new country/continent; drank alcohol at 9 am local time (it was 4 am "my time"); wrote a masters thesis.

2. Did you keep your new year’s resolutions, and will you make more for next year?
I didn't really have resolutions last year, but I have been really bad about getting sleep since I moved to Utrecht. I will make resolutions this year. They are: learn to speak Dutch; complain/worry less about being single; find my equilibrium in the Netherlands - get my confidence back; find the joy in life again.

3. Did anyone close to you give birth?
My best friend Anne (and her husband) gave birth to Noah.

4. Did anyone close to you die?
My Uncle Tom died of brain cancer.

5. What countries did you visit?
USA, Netherlands. (Kinda Ireland too, I had a beer in the airport there on my layover). No new countries though ):

6. What would you like to have in 2010 that you lacked in 2009?
Stability. A significant other.

7. What dates from 2009 will remain etched upon your memory, and why?
My sister's wedding, the day I moved to the Netherlands, the day Noah Serrell-Dube was born, the 12 days Kevin visited me in Utrecht.

8. What was your biggest achievement of the year?
Graduating from Johns Hopkins Bloomberg School of Public Health with a Master of Health Sciences in Molecular Microbiology and Immunology.

9. What was your biggest failure?
I finished knitting a couple things I have not yet seamed.....

10. Did you suffer illness or injury?
Oh yes. After moving to the Netherlands i've been sick with all sorts of crazy things. I'll spare the details.

11. What was the best thing you bought?
My Dutch bike. My Obermeyer winter coat.

12. Whose behavior merited celebration?
My co-worker who let me crash at his place when the trains weren't running and drove me to the airport in a huge snow storm.

13. Whose behavior made you appalled and depressed?
Lots of Americans - in general. Many random Dutchies.

14. Where did most of your money go?
Moving. Rent. Moving. Air tickets.

15. What did you get really, really, really excited about?
Moving to Europe. Meeting Noah.

16. What song will always remind you of 2009?
First taste by Triggerfinger

17. Compared to this time last year, are you: a) happier or sadder?  b) thinner or fatter?  c) richer or poorer?
Sadder, thinner, more debt but also more spending money due to a steady paycheck.

18. What do you wish you’d done more of?
Seen the USA. Seen the Netherlands in the summer.

19. What do you wish you’d done less of?
Worry.

20. How will you be spending Christmas?
I spent it with my family in Illinois.

21. Did you fall in love in 2009?
I have fallen completely in love with baby Noah. I told him I wont be having kids for at least 5 more years, so he can be the love of my life.

23. What was your favorite TV program?
In the States I watched Lost, Deadliest Catch, How the Earth was Made, South Park. In the Netherlands I watch Weeds and Californication.

24. Do you hate anyone now that you didn’t hate this time last year?
Nope, no hate.

25. What was the best book you read?
The Time Traveler's Wife by Audrey Niffenegger

26. What was your greatest musical discovery?
Triggerfinger!! Them Crooked Vultures!

27. What did you want and get?
I'm drawing a blank here

28. What did you want and not get?
too many things this year

29. What was your favorite film of this year?
didnt see many films this year. But I did see some amazing ones this past week: Avatar, 500 Days of Summer, Up, District 9. Also saw Old Boy for the first time, pretty mind-blowing.

30. What did you do on your birthday, and how old were you?
I was 27. It was pretty crappy. I didnt do anything. My sister's wedding was the day before and no one was interested in me. Wouldnt even drive me to the train station so I could go downtown Chicago. No cake either. Why bother? - they had cake the day before at her wedding.

31. What one thing would have made your year immeasurably more satisfying?
Feeling like I belong somewhere in this world.

32. How would you describe your personal fashion concept in 2009?
Same as 2007-2009: Wear whatever doesnt make me look like a pudgeball - it involved lots of black.

33. What kept you sane?
I'm pretty sure I lost my sanity this year

34. Which celebrity/public figure did you fancy the most?
No one really

35. What political issue stirred you the most?
Marriage equality - no reason the States should discriminate. Immigration rights. Now that I'm an Expatriate/Immigrant these things are important for me.

36. Who did you miss?
My friends who are not in the same country as me. My Grampa.

37. Who was the best new person you met? Why?
I met so many new people!! - I cant pick just one! Brent has been awesome for teaching me Dutch; Sue and Tamara live in my building and are great neighbors; the knitters on tuesdays have listened to my immigration woes and offered advice; my Dutch office-mates Eveleine, Marieke, and Axel help me with cultural integration; co-workers Wouter, Bas, Bart, Claudia are fun to drink with; Andras has helped me with all the Dutch animal experimentation laws, regulations, and paperwork; and I reconnected with Kevin after loosing touch for over a year - he really helped me through the bad times when I first moved.

38. Tell us a valuable life lesson you learned in 2009.
Life as an immigrant is like a sine wave: it's in constant motion, there are very high highs and very low lows and you can flux between the two states very rapidly.

39. Quote a song lyric that sums up your year.
I dont have a song lyric, but I do have a quote I've been thinking about (Amanda posted it on her blog a while back). "I am not afraid of storms, for I am learning to sail my own ship" ~Louisa May Alcott.

a day in the life

2009-08-30T14:45:00.005-04:00

I really hope I stumble on a good luck charm soon. Some days are such a mix bag of meh. Today seemed to exemplify my life here more than other days. So many things in one day! And more importantly, I had a camera to document all of them!

Here is the blanket I brought with me. It fell apart in the washing machine. Literally. I had to vacuum up the pieces (see picture below). I brought this one with because it is for a twin size bed. I guess that it's age is apparent. I think its over 10 years old, I dont remember when it was bought....

Pieces of blanket EVERYWHERE.
You know its a bad day when you have to vacuum up 1/4 your blanket off the floor. My never-ending Netherlands bad luck continues.

Chickens walking along the bike path!! This is so "Dutch" to me. These are the things that I love about this country (yes, there Are some). I really enjoy the little bits of nature I get when I bike around the Uithof.

Love the tree lined bike paths! And there are many. This was the one I biked down today.

I've Never seen birds sitting on sheep!!! Haha. So Cute! They even switched sheep every couple mins. Hopping off and hopping back onto another. Maybe they were eating something the grazing sheep turned up?

I felt really slow and out of shape when hundreds of bike racers passed by me. Luckily, they were on the real road with the cars so I didnt get swarmed or anything.

Shortly after this I pinched my sciatic nerve when I made a sharp turn on my bike. The ride home was not very pleasant. I stretched a Lot when I got home and so far it's calmed down.

This evening I cooked another recipe from the "Eating for Sustained Energy" book my coworker lent to me. I had high hopes but it suffered the fate of most of the dishes I make: lack of taste. Either I'm not using enough spices, or I'm not using the ones I like. Sigh. Keep calm and carry on.

decisions, decisions

2009-08-23T14:24:00.006-04:00

I've decided where it will go. But, I'm torn between the two depictions. And i dont have the money. Yet. And I havent chosen the studio. Yet. But I have an itch. And it musts needs to be scratched.

I adore the ribbon structure, but I think it might be a bit too complicated for a small tattoo. Plus, it might cost me a bajillion dollars to get something so intricate. Sigh.

I better decide soon though. I finished my masters in May and this was supposed to be my congrats present
to myself.

*In case you are a non-science type, these are molecular representations of Immunoglobulin M, IgM, a pentamer antibody.

beautiful yarn problem

2009-08-05T12:56:00.002-04:00

I'm having a very serious problem. I brought only my most beautiful yarn and yarn i wanted to start projects with soon to the Netherlands. Except, for the beautiful yarn I'm having trouble committing to any one project. I really love the yarn, and I want to knit something with it so that I can wear the beautiful colors, but I'm afraid. I'm afraid of picking the wrong pattern and "ruining" the yarn. I'm afraid to commit to a pattern in case something better comes along. But then it will sit on my shelf forever. And that's not good either. sigh. I should just dive in really.

thoughts

2009-07-31T17:19:00.002-04:00

I am totally supposed to be learning Dutch right now. But it makes my brain hurt! So of course I procrastinate by writing a quick post since I'm usually procrastinating blogging.

I am pretty much through all the difficulties of "settling in." I think. My permanent residence card should be arriving any week now.... But everything else is taken care of and that is a relief. All I have to do now to fit in is learn to speak the language. Sure... Well, it's slow going but I am trying. I've never been very good at languages. Sigh.

I also want to say to anyone thinking of moving to a new country: it's a giant pain in the ass. No really, it is. Since I didnt know any Americans who had done this before me (I know they are out there, I just didnt know any personally) I didnt really have anyone to ask advice. But just so that everyone is aware: countries do not want you to move. No matter where you are from, no matter where you are going, I'm convinced its a shit fest. Everything is difficult. Everything will give you headaches. Just know this and take comfort in the fact that you are not alone.

Once you get through all the initial paperwork crap though, it gets better. It's still not "easy" but hey, life never is. I am starting to actually enjoy my life here. Having a bike really helps. the fact that I love to ride helps too. Here, a bike = freedom. At some point I'll sit down and type out the specifics of the insanity I went through as an ex-pat/immigrant from the US to the Netherlands, in case anyone in the future is curious. But it will have to wait. I should really go learn the question words. And conjugate some verbs and such.

Tot ziens

Potato chips

2009-07-08T12:48:00.002-04:00

About 3 years ago I began an unnatural love affair with potato chips after having not eaten them for over 10 years (not out of dietary concerns, i just wasnt interested). So of course when I moved here the potato chip selection was one of the first things I checked in the supermarkets.
They do of course have Pringles and Lays and Doritos here, but they are really expensive, so I've been sticking to local brands. And they are a bit odd. In flavor choice that is.

Common potato chip flavors here:
Paprika (really? that stuff doesnt really have a flavor....)
Bolognese (A potato chip flavored like a pasta sauce? Weird, but not bad tasting)
Cheddar Onion, or Onion Cheese (again, weird, but not bad tasting)
and finally...
BBQ Ham
wait, what?
BBQ ham???? Sure, real BBQ ham is great if you get it from the right place that knows what they are doing.... but a potato chip flavor? In the Netherlands no less, not exactly a place renouned for their BBQ.... Yeah, I'm going to stay far away from that one. I cant imagine anything less palatable than a potato chip fake flavored like ham. blech.

Sorta FO

2009-07-05T12:33:00.002-04:00

I keep meaning to post about my moving adventures, and I just never get around to it. Soon, I promise. Maybe. But anyway, here is a finished sock. It's not exactly a proper FO as it is only one sock of the pair, however it is my third sock ever, so I'm excited. Even more excited that it actually fits! Even better.
The pattern is Jaywalker by Grumperina and details of course are on my Ravelry page.

weekend away

2009-05-03T20:28:00.009-04:00

After a hellish homestretch, my thesis was printed and submitted on Friday morning. I am so beyond relieved that it is done. Then I packed and took the train down to southern Maryland to visit Amanda and Jason.

I knit them a beer cozy as a thanks for having me over for the weekend. Do you recognize this yarn? (: It's ChOrG! My Kool-Aid hand dyed! I love this yarn. It's so soft and smooshy. It's very pretty all knit up.

On Friday night the three of us went out to dinner, Amanda got her 3rd tattoo (some stars on her wrist), and then we went back to the restaurant (next door to the tattoo parlor) and had celebratory drinks.

On Saturday Amanda and I went to Maryland Sheep and Wool. It was dreary, chilly, and pouring rain when we got there which was a giant bummer. But luckily around noon the skies cleared and it got sunny. I didnt get any pictures of the yarn because the festival was jam packed. I could barely get in some of the stalls to look at the goods!!
Sadly I did not find yarn for specific projects, or a shawl pin that I liked, but I did get some beautiful yarn. I tired to take pictures of it, but it was so bleak today that I couldnt get good ones.

Here are some sheeps for you to enjoy. I didnt see a whole lot of alpacas. There were some bunnies too but all the little kids were crowding around them so, no pictures.

After the festival Amanda, Jason and I went out for yummy Thai food. Here is the appetizer platter - it's a party on a plate! Notice the random party explosion coming out of the shrimp thingy. It was very nom nom.

Today brought more rainy, depressing weather so Amanda and I decided to spend some quality time crafting. Here is Sydney claiming the ironing board as his own while Amanda quilts. I sewed up a new WIP bag.

For the WIP bag, I used this tutorial that I had used before..... But... either we read it wrong the first time or Amanda and I were doing something wrong today, b/c the pattern as written didnt work. The 21 inches of the big rectangle doesnt fit all the way around the 6x6 inch bottom square. Both Amanda and I tried. I ended up having to cut the bottom squares down to 5.5 x 5.5 inches.

It's a beautiful bag though. Muchas gracias to Amanda who let me dig through her fabric stash for this!

And here is the inside fabric.

It's definatly not fabric I would normally buy for myself, but when I saw it today I really liked it. I dont know what's up with me and red lately. But whatevs, I'll run with it.

Here it is next to the first bag I made. I think my sewing today was not the best quality, but I think non-crafters would have a hard time finding fault with it. I really like that it's taller. Now I just need a cord to cinch it up. I thought I had a light blue shoelace but I dont, it's purple. So I might knit a brown I-cord.

All-in-all, a lovely weekend! And as soon as the sun comes back I will post some pictures of the crazy awesome yarn I bought at MDSW!

I also finished one shawl, and made serious progress on the never ending stole of grey. But the damn thing still isnt close to being done and I have 4 days! Yikes! - I gotta run now and go knit some more!

Happy colors

2009-04-26T22:16:00.006-04:00

My thesis pretty much imploded on Friday. I had a reader tear it apart at the very last minute and of course, instead of being productive, I've wallowed in depression this weekend. And a little bit of anger too. I've worked on my thesis yes, just not on her corrections, yet. So on Saturday when I noticed that the grocery store had a big stand with all sorts of Kool Aid flavors (previous weeks it had only 4, yes kids, 4 flavors), I knew it was time to scratch the Kool Aid dying itch.

First I washed the Knit Picks Bare Superwash merino/nylon yarn in gentle shampoo and left it soaking in water.

Then I mixed the Kool Aid packets (black cherry, orange, grape) into cups of water and "painted" the yarn. I found out that my brand new baster does not have a seal (grrr) and had to spoon the dye onto the yarn. Also, I used waaayyy too much liquid and had to sponge it up repeatedly.

But the end result was a beautiful skein of happy colored yummy smelling (and still a bit sticky) yarn. Red and orange are not my usual colors but I just adore this yarn. It produced the desired result and has indeed given me happiness.

Sure, there are some white spots, but I actually dont mind, I think it gives the yarn character. And it reminds me that it's "hand-painted."

I named it ChOrG. Ugly name for a beautiful yarn.

In fact, I just started knitting with the yarn and I adore the colorway even more! None of the pictures really captures the brightness and saturation of the yarn. It's very pretty and complex and somehow manages to self-stripe very nicely, without much pooling.

Happiness all around.

Well, except for the fact that I still have the never-ending stole of gray to finish in TWO WEEKS. Ugh. Cross your fingers! (I'm halfway done).

In other news - the BRUINS swept the Canadiens to make it to the second round of the Stanley Cup playoffs!!!!

Excitement

2009-04-16T17:17:00.003-04:00

I have to admit, I keep seeing Amstel Light commercials on the TV and I get really excited. Like, goose-bump excited. Holey-cow-I'm-going-to-live-there-excited. I don't even like Amstel Light. But the commercials are chock full of Amsterdam, football, and Dutch awesomeness.

It reminds me of when I was in Utrecht last summer and Holland was playing Russia in the Euro Cup. I went to a bar with a Canadian couple to see the game. I had gotten a Holland shirt at a tourist stand and the guy had gotten free lederhosen at the bar (it had a tail on the back for the lion). Here are our best lion grrrs. haha. Too bad Holland lost and the streets were full of madness.

Happy Bobmas

2009-04-11T12:45:00.002-04:00

HAPPY BOBMAS!!

Like gmail, Ravelry is one of those internet inventions I just cant imagine my life without. Well, Ok, I can, but its a pretty crap life.

Also a shout out happy birthday to Stariel!

And now its off to school I go b/c I have serious work to do on the thesis (ahhhhh!)

Ruined

2009-04-09T17:33:00.003-04:00

That's right. Knit Picks Harmony needles have ruined me. And caused me to do something I thought I would never do: alter knitting needles. What am I talking about? Well, you see KP Harmony are very pointy. After I got used to the pointy-ness I started to like it. I recently went back to my Takumi bamboo needles (b/c I only have Harmonies in a couple sizes) and they were way too blunt! I couldnt knit! Well, at least I couldnt do twisted knit stitches fast on a shuttle bus.

So, I sanded the bamboo needles to a better point! Crazy I know. Then I oiled them up with some jojoba oil, but they werent slippery enough. I i rubbed them on a natural candle. The pointy tip is so much better! Except, it is a bit pointier than the KP even, so I have to be careful to not split the yarn.

Here is a pict of the SM shawl so far. The Sea Pearl is super shiny so the flash bounces right off of the yarn - but it's very pretty in person! Cant wait to drop all those sts at the end
(:

Crunch time

2009-04-07T19:28:00.004-04:00

There comes a time in every knitters life where what you want to knit, and the time you have to knit it clash completely and you have to either not knit it, lose sleep, or pick a different pattern.

I'm currently trying to finish one shawl (Woodland Shawl) to wear that matches my bridesmaids dress for my sister's wedding (May 9). I'm also secret knitting a giftie for her and her husband (due May 9). I also wanted to knit a shawl to wear with my rehearsal dinner dress (May 8), b/c it matches the shoes and it would really pull the outfit together. I also have to finish secret giftie for my best friend for her first baby. I want to get it done by the baby shower (May 30), and I have to get it done before I move to Europe (June 16). Just for added difficulty, I'm also working on my thesis and I have midterms and papers to complete for 4th term classes. I've got a LOT to finish by my birthday (May 10).

Right now the baby giftie is started, but on hold. I'm currently dividing my time between the Woodland shawl and wedding gifite. I have not started the rehearsal dinner shawl. But I've realized that the shuttle ride to and home from school is time that could be spent knitting. Unfortunalty, all current projects are just far too big to lug around. But the rehersal dinner shawl.... that could be popped in a bag for shuttle ride knitting.

Originally, I had my heart set on knitting Clapotis with my Briar Rose Sea Pearl yarn for the rehearsal dinner. Except the Clapotis calls for ~800 yards and my skein is only ~500 yds. I could use a bigger needle size, or adjust the patten, but those both take time. I dont have time. I've come to the realization that I just do not have the time to knit the Clapotis with this yarn for this project. So I started looking for something similar and simpler on Ravelry. I found the Sunday Market Shawl - another drop stitch design. And since this pattern is written in a way that you can stop knitting when you get close to the end of your yarn, it's a much more logical project. Also, it's knit on large needles so it should go quite fast.

So, Sunday Market Shawl it is. Cross your fingers that all projects are completed on time!

Here is the Sea Pearl hand wound into the most perfect spaceship looking center pull ball. Hooray for another Rhinebeck 2007 yarn CO!

Procrastination

2009-04-06T22:11:00.004-04:00

Since I'm having trouble concentrating on Anything today (I'm currently watching TV, reading, blogging, and I've got knitting sitting next to me) I thought, why not post about a few of my favorite things in Europe. I've been thinking about Europe "in my spare time" haha considering the Big Move is ~10 weeks away.
These are a few of my favorite things (in Europe):

Really old things randomly interspersed through the cities.
Brick from where the canal used to be, the water has now moved several feet and there's a path where it used to be.
Utrecht, Netherlands

Art. Lots of it.

One of Monet's waterlilies at the Musee de l'Orangerie in Paris, France

Faces on buildings. Everywhere! I could write a whole post on faces, maybe I will.....
This one is on some historic building in Bruges, Belgium

Chocolate!! Believe it or not, this is the Only picture of Chocolate I have. I ate the rest too fast. Maybe I have this b/c it's the only piece of "special" chocolate I bought. The rest was good stuff from grocery stores. This was from a specialty shop in Gent, Belgium.

Alcohol!! Specifically beer, beer, and more beer, and some jenever. Both are in this picture from Gent, Belgium. No surprise that plenty of my favorite things are from Belgium as Gent and Bruges were my favorite cities.

Bummer

2009-04-04T21:43:00.005-04:00

A couple months ago I signed up for free magazine subscriptions using some airline miles that were going to expire (seriously, expire? that's b*llsh*t. they shouldnt expire. but i digress). One of the magazines was Prevention. There was an article with a recipe for a "Smart cookie," a healthy chocolate chip cookie. Well, I'm always game for new chocolate chip cookies. I've been dying to bake this (well, bake anything) for a couple of weeks but I've been busy with my thesis. I'll give you the recipe and then let you know what I thought.

1 1/2 Cup whole wheat flour
1 tsp baking soda
1/2 tsp ground cinnamon
1/2 tsp salt
1/2 cup canola oil
2/3 cup granulated sugar
2/3 cup brown sugar (as i type this i realize i missed this ingredient)
2 lg egg whites
1 1/4 tsp vanilla extract
1/2 cup old-fashioned rolled oats
3/4 cup semisweet chocolate chips or chunks

Combine flour, baking soda, salt, cinnamon. In another large bowl whisk oil, and sugar. Whisk in eggs and vanilla until smooth. Stir in dry ingrediants. Fold in oats then chocolate chips. Chill dough at least 15 mins. Heat oven to 375F. Bake 7-10 mins.

Ok, so yes, I didnt see the brown sugar but I dont think that would have made a difference. First, there is a bit of user error on my part. I didnt realize that "Steel cut Irish Style Oatmeal" meant that it was chopped up in little pieces.... I'm not sure if this is what I was supposed to use or not. I'm used to the standard rolled oats. I guess I wasnt paying attention when I bought these.

They look better in the picture than they tasted.
The recipe called for oil instead of butter (its supposedly healthier) it didnt cook the same and the cookies were greasy. Also, the oats didnt absorb any of the oil and were still chewy. So yeah, greasy oaty chewy cookie. And the oats got stuck in my teeth.

In terms of taste they were ok. I def think that the taste of butter is far superior to the taste of canola oil. So, maybe my cookies are healthier, but they are not as satisfying.

In conclusion, this recipe gets a hands down from me.
Bummer.

In knitting news I've re-started the Woodland Shawl on larger needles. I like it bettern ow, but seriously, what's the point of a swatch if it doesnt do you any good in the end? Wasted time.... Wouldnt be such a big deal if I wasnt on a deadline for this shawl.

summary through pictures

2009-03-29T19:17:00.005-04:00

Just a quick post. Some knit FO's I havent posted. And some pictures from this weekend's trip to visit Amanda and Jason in the greater DC metro area. We went into DC on Sat. In other news I think I'm going to frog the woodland shawl I've got and restart on larger needles. SIGH.

Biggest moth I've ever seen - it was as big as my hand!

This butterfly loved Amanda's camera strap

Cherry Blossoms in DC

Blueberry Corn Muffins

2009-03-12T20:36:00.005-04:00

Every month or two I get a new baking obsession. In Jan and Feb it was the Pillsbury poppin fresh grands biscuits. I just couldnt get enough. I loved the pop when you open the canister. And the buttery flaky goodness.

This month, its corn bread. MMMhhmm. But reg corn muffins kinda bore me. So I looked around the kitchen to see what I could add to the reg "Jiffy" box. Wheat germ and blueberries! I've been trying to eat more of both since apparently they help hair grow.
So this recipe is pretty simple.

I dont think the box or the recipe has changed in 50 years.
(yes there is lard in the mix, that's why it tastes so damn good).

1 Box "Jiffy" cornbread. Make as suggested.
Add 2 heaping tablespoons of wheat germ.
Let stand a couple minutes.
add 1 heaping cup frozen blueberries.
spoon into muffin cups cook 20 mins at 400F.

This is what they look like
Yummy goodness
I think that this ratio of berry to mix is the max berries you can get away with. The still have structural integrity, but you can tell they are on the verge of collapse.

And what do you eat with them for dinner? Some ham of course. B/c if there's 1 thing Anthony Bourdain has taught us, its that pork goes well with everything and everything goes well with pork.

WIP Sunday

2009-02-22T12:48:00.007-05:00

Just an update on the progress of a couple WIP. I'm also expecting a package from Knit Picks soon, but that's for secret gift knitting, so it will not be blogged about until gifted (although the person who it is intended for is not a member of Ravelry, so there is a chance you can follow the progress there).

First we have the Lace Ribbon scarf.

Nice detail shot here.

And a picture of the progress here.
I'm really loving this scarf but its a boring knit. So I pick it up occasionally when I have a few minutes to spare. One thing I have to be careful about is that I keep forgetting to do the YO and I have to either tink or add a random stitch. I dont know why I have such selective memory about the YO.
It's a bit dreary today so the color isnt coming out quite right, but the greens are really saturated and amazing and remind me of the trees in Germany. Or emeralds. (:{

Last is the Woodland Shawl that I intend to wear at my sister's wedding in May. It's hard to tell scale, so that is about 8 inches of knitting. Also really like this and the pattern is easy to memorize so if I have an hour I can get quite a bit dine on it. It's become my TV knitting.

Also of note, I knit another bad hair cut hat with some leftover Ultra Alpaca hoping to use most of it up. But I didnt. So I'm left with the same problem that I started with. -->
Except now they are slightly smaller balls, but still just as many of them.
Sigh.

Oh, I almost forgot. You cant see but I'm using Knit Picks Harmony Interchangeable needles for the Woodland Shawl and I just Love them. They have sharp points which I really appreciate for lace knitting. And the colors of the wood needles make me happy every time I knit with them. I will def be ordering more of them!

Expatriate vs Immigrant

2009-02-21T22:40:00.005-05:00

I've been thinking about my Europe move a lot lately. Mostly because there is a LOT to take care of and now that my eyes are getting better I'm finally getting on it. A little late but hopefully still time enough. I've noticed that I use the words expatriate and immigrant pretty equally to describe myself. I was thinking maybe I should pick one so I looked up the definition on Wikipedia. According to Wikipedia, foreign born covers both immigrants and expatriates, but doesnt adequately describe either. An immigrant is a foreign born committed to living in a new country permanently and an expatriate plan to eventually return to their birth country. And therein lies the problem. Neither of those define me in the Netherlands. I dont intend to return to the USA, but I also dont intend to permanently live in the Netherlands. That's because I dont Intend to do anything. I cant. Being a scientist I have little control over where I go. Also, being a scientist dictates movement. You cant do your PhD and your post-doc at the same institution. Or, at least, its frowned upon. Also, I havent even decided if I want to stay in academia. And infectious diseases is not exactly big money, so not many biomed or pharmaceutical companies even have infectious disease units, let alone bacterial divisions. So, seing as my career future is so open, I'm not making any sort of commitment to geography. I will however try to integrate into Dutch society and I do intend to learn as much of the language as possible. The only thing at present that I am seriously considering is never permanently returning to the USA. So, doesnt that make me an immigrant? Or maybe, just a nomad? (Nomad, wanderer, roamer, vagabond, call me what you will!!! yeah!) (sorry, random Metallica interlude there). Expatriate until further notice? Sigh. Maybe I'll just settle on nomad.

Also, on Fri I received my official appointment from UMC Utrecht. As of July 1, 2009 I will be a PhD student jointly with UMC Utrecht (the medical school where I'll perform my research) and the Eijkman Graduate School of Immunology and Infectious Diseases (the part of the University that oversees the PhD program). I'm so excited! Its official. It never feels official until you have that acceptance letter in your hand. Oh sure, I have to submit my project proposal to the PhD Board and have it be accepted no more than 2 months after July 1 (sort of like a grant application) but I think that's more like a formality. At least, I hope so.

Sigh, now I just have to find a place to live. Which I hear, is no easy feat in Utrecht. So, keep your fingers crossed for me! Or, if you know anyone living in Utrecht maybe you can ask them if they have any advice? I'm sure I'll have plenty to say on this when I get into the thick of the search soon.

Roast Cornish Hen

2009-02-08T20:50:00.006-05:00

It's going to take a while to write this as I'll be taking "eye breaks" but I wanted to get it down before I forgot it - this meal was really yummy! (until I hit a bloody part deep in the hen) (note - cook longer than 1 hour in my oven)

I bought a little Cornish Hen since they were on sale and I had been craving some sort of roast with veggies since Marty's mom made pot roast for his b-day dinner. I've also been lusting after Pilsbury flaky buttery biscuits in the little rolls that POP open thanks to that meal as well. I suppose cooking inspiration is a good thing right? Esp for me since I'm a self proclaimed "bad cook, great baker." I looked up this recipe and altered it a bit since I didnt have all of the ingredients.

2/8 of Lemon and 1 garlic clove went inside the hen.
Rubbed hen with olive oil and covered generously with sea salt and pepper and celery salt.
Cut up red potatos and carrots and onion - into pot with ~4 whole garlic cloves.
Cook in oven uncovered 25 mins at 450 deg.

Meanwhile make basting sauce.
I heated a chick bouillon cube and H2O (didnt have broth). Then I added a squeeze of lemon juice, olive oil, and some National Bohemian Beer. (didnt have white wine)

(Go ahead and laugh. It's crap beer I know, but its
the only alcohol I have besides red wine and rum. - neither would have worked for this recipe, but the beer had possibility. still light tasting, still alcohol)

Turn oven to 350 deg and pour basting sauce over hen. Then baste every 10 mins for 30 mins. Remove from oven and use juices and garlic cloves to make a sauce by boiling it down a bit.

It was all very tasty and yummy until I hit some blood while trying to cut off a wing. So clearly an hour in the oven is not enough. I'm not a big fan of blood so I decided just to eat the veggies and callit a night. I had already eaten some of the meat before I discovered the uncooked part anyhow. So I cut up the other half of the potato and another carrot, added some more garlic cloves and covered the hen up and popped it in the fridge. I'll "re-heat" / finish cooking it tomorrow for dinner. It was yummy. And the skin was the best part - and yes, it's good for you. Well, um, maybe not scientifically proven but my Great-Gramma always said to eat the skin and she lived through the Depression and past her 100th year. Therefore, I trust her advice.

Obsession with a water drop

2009-02-08T00:07:00.004-05:00

I watered my plants today as I do once every weekend. I noticed a drop of water dangling from the leaf of one of the plants. It caught the sun and glistened. I then became obsessed with capturing this semi-fleeting moment. Too bad my camera is just not designed for up close high res high mag picts. But it takes pictures of good enough quality that I can crop and enlarge. Here are a few.

I also started another hat to cover up my hideous mullet haircut. This time using random balls of leftover Ultra Alpaca. I hope that I have enough to make it to the end....

can i have new eyes??

2009-02-05T22:11:00.002-05:00

I know I promised to blog more and I really do have a lot to blog about (lots of knitting going on!) but I really can not right now. I'm trying to severely limit my computer time. I've had some pretty serious eye strain and I have to go see a retina specialist on Monday for (5 hours!) extra testing as the reg eye dr thinks there is fluid in my retina (joy). This is in addition to needing new glasses with a stronger prescription And bifoculs for reading. B/c I'm 65 yah know. Ughed. (I'll save you all the bitching about how my body is falling apart far too soon for my liking. I'm not even 30 but you'd think I was 65+ looking at my medical info).
I've noticed that the amount of time I spend on the computer correlates with eye strain and thus the limit. I'm bummed but the eye pain is almost too much to bear otherwise. And of course I'm a bit more concerned that my school work is begining to suffer. I'm hoping this will resolve asap so I can resume my "normal" functions.

New WIP: Lace Ribbon Scarf

2009-01-17T11:35:00.004-05:00

Its amazing what a couple days off from school just hanging out in my apt will do. I should be doing some research for my thesis, but the past couple of days I've felt kinda crappy so I've been taking it easy and knitting / sleeping instead.

I've wanted to knit this scarf with this yarn for some time now, I was just waiting to finish some of the other WIP's I had on the docket. I'm really excited about it so far, I just hope that the yarn softens up a bit after a wash with Eucalan as my neck is pretty sensitive. The yarn is 20% silk and 20% tencel both of which can be soft, so I'm not worried.

Here are some pictures of 24 hours worth of progress: 2 pattern repeats.

I really like the shade changes - they give this pattern a little extra oomph.

Also excited to CO my first project using one of my Rhinebeck 2007 haul. Hooray for stash yarn!

Another swatch for Woodland Shawl

2009-01-16T14:57:00.003-05:00

Swatch using needle size US 5.

Remember how I said size 6 was too loose? Well, I change my mind. I just knit the same size swatch with size 5 needles and it was too tight. Maybe if I were knitting a scarf, this is the size I would use. But for a shawl, I think I prefer some dainty-ness. A bit more lace quality to it. So, size 6 it is. Which means this project will have to go on hold as I only have 16" circs. I need to buy a longer circular before I CO.

I've been thinking of getting some of the Knit Picks Options in Harmony so that instead of piece by piece buying one needle I'll actually be buying 3. And also since there are some things I want to buy from Knit Picks right now and I need needles anyhow (I buy most things online now since there aren't any yarn stores near me and they do not have good selection anyhow).

Swatch: Woodland Shawl

2009-01-15T16:54:00.004-05:00

Seeing as how I am trying to stay on top of my blog posts, here is a swatch of a soon to be WIP. I wanted to knit a shawl to wear at my sisters wedding and I decided on the Woodland Shawl. First, I think it looks good in sold color yarn - I'm using a cone of mercerized gray cotton I have since the dresses are black with beading on the bodice that is outlined in silver/gray. Second, the leaf pattern mimics the central shape on the beading, so I think the shawl will nicely complement my dress. Since the cone cotton is meant to be used for weaving, I had no idea what needle size to use. I ballparked size 6 and knit up a 24 st swatch. I think it looks ok, I'm going to swatch it in size 5 needles and see if I like that more. If not, i'll stick with the size 6.

The yarn is: Valley Cottons 3/2 Mercerized Perle Cotton, 1 pound, in color 8473, lot 81495, and I bought it at one of the Webs tent sales a while back (there may have even been a post on this somewhere).
So in case you ever wondered what needle size to use with size 3/2 cone cotton, size 6 is decent. Its probably about right, I'm just going to try size 5 and see what I get since with all the knit/purl switches in the pattern, my stiches are a bit loosy-goosy and I'd prefer better, tighter definition for this pattern.

Also, my mitts based off of the Pomatomus sock pattern finished drying / blocking today. Its nearly impossible to get nice pictures of mitts while you are wearing them!!

Further also, I've been slowly working on a painting I started in August. I've never been much of a painter, I didn't even take painting when I did my minor in visual arts - I stuck to the 3d stuff like sculpture. So, please, dont be too harsh on me. But I inherited a canvas, and some acrylic paint, so I decided to give it a go. Most of my stuff in in shades of purple and green so I stuck with that theme. My old room in Brookline, MA was this awesome shade of mossy green and I started with that color since I miss it. It's a WIP and I'm taking my time so I can let it "talk to me" and see where it goes. (:{

About Ear Stretching

2009-01-14T23:03:00.003-05:00

About two years ago I decided to stretch my lowest earlobes from a 14/16 gauge ear ring to 12 gauge. I did this because I thought that most captive bead rings or curved barbells didnt really show up. They didnt catch my eye in the mirror next to my long hair. When I fell in love with some oblong / oval rings at LeRoi.com I ordered them in size 12G hoping they would stand out better. I didnt pay much attention to this initial stretch and popped the new rings right in with little discomfort. After happily wearing these for over 1 year I became anxious again to change. I ordered some horn spirals in 12G, but when they arrived I was sorely disappointed. They were much smaller than I thought they would be. When I had my rook pierced (which btw, finally healed in December) I looked in the cases at the body jewelry and realized to get the desired look, I would need to go to 4G or 2G. But, stretching takes time, and patience.

I bought a pair of 10G captive bead rings and knowing that I should now start using lubricant and a tapered end to stretch, I looked through my knitting needles for the appropriate size. Using Vaseline, I slid the knitting needle in then followed quickly with the rings. Here are some pictures from the adventure.

A month or so after this stretch I stumbled across Zebrawood Spiral rings at OneTribe.nu and fell in love. As I perused their site I also found a great guide for stretching.
After almost 6 weeks of rest my next round of stretching (to 8G) came after a trip to the mall yielded stainless steel tapered rings in my next two sizes (buying rings for intermediate sizes at LeRoi.com was getting pricey). No pictures from that stretch.

During my annual Christmas trip to Chicago to see my family I noticed that the cold weather was taking a toll on my ears. They were itchy and flaky and dry. I knew that OneTribe carried oils for ear care but I was not quite ready for my zebrawood rings (need to wait for some cash inflow - plus, I'm not there yet gauge-wise) so I decided to look elsewhere. Chameleon Tattoo and Piercing in Boston did not carry any products but a staff member recomended using generic Vitamin E oil from a drugstore. I hit up the Fenway Rite Aid and grabbed a small bottle of Vitemin E (28,000 I.U.) for $5.99. Then I spotted some Burt's Bees Lemon Butter Cuticle Cream. The ingredients are almond oil, beeswax, lemon oil, cocoa butter, Vitamin E, candelilla wax, sunflower oil, rosemary leaf extract, beta carotene, and vegetable oil (95% natural!). Knowing that all of those components are very good for your skin I snatched it up at $5.99. While I was at REI I went ahead and grabbed some Dr. Bronner's Hemp Lavender Castille Liquid soap for $3.99, just in case it was myuse of bar soap that was drying my ears.

So far I've used the soap and its nice. I've used the Burt's Bees at night, it smells wonderful and seems to soothe my stretchings. I've also used dabs of Vit E when re-inserting my rings, so it would get inside to heal the piercings. So far I'm not a fan of the sticky-ness of the Vit E. I might try and dilute it with some other kind of oil. Maybe Safflower or something else I can get my hands on.

After another week or so of using the Burt's Cream at night I'll see how I feel about going to 6G. It's been 6.5 weeks since the last stretch. I might try to hold out for 8 weeks, just because I dont want to damage my ears. I'll see how antsy I get.

Triumphant return??

2009-01-12T16:24:00.004-05:00

I know, grad school has been crazy. Life has been crazy. I've been gone for some time. I am going to TRY to get back to blogging (hence the questionable triumph). I figured I'd start with the 2008 wrap-up, using the same questions as last year.

1. What did you do in 2008 that you’d never done before?
Visited Europe; went on a vacation by myself; drove a giant moving truck cross-country; killed a cockroach (well ok, many); flew over-seas; started grad-school; switched to an Apple computer - bought a laptop.

2. Did you keep your new year’s resolutions, and will you make more for next year?
I did fairly well last year. Since this is year is going to be particularly crazy what with graduating from Hopkins, leaving Baltimore and moving to Europe, I have no resolutions this year, other than to savor the calm moments and get plenty of sleep.

3. Did anyone close to you give birth?
Just cousins again.

4. Did anyone close to you die?
Not this year.

5. What countries did you visit?
England, Spain, the Netherlands, Germany, Belgium, France!

6. What would you like to have in 2009 that you lacked in 2008?
A significant other.

7. What dates from 2008 will remain etched upon your memory, and why?
The days I left for and returned from EuroCrazy08. Election day (hooray Barack Obama!)

8. What was your biggest achievement of the year?
Acceptance into and success in grad school.

9. What was your biggest failure?
Medical school rejection, again.

10. Did you suffer illness or injury?
No "real" injuries thank goodness (there were a couple sprained wrists and ankles from nights of drinking and dancing). Illness - yes. Two head colds, one bought of coughing, a UTI, and food poisoning all during my EuroCrazy08 trip.

11. What was the best thing you bought?
My Gregory backpack and my MacBook.

12. Whose behavior merited celebration?
The American people.

13. Whose behavior made you appalled and depressed?
The locals in Barcelona. My neighbors in Baltimore. Israel and Palestine.

14. Where did most of your money go?
Rent. EuroCrazy08 Trip. Grad school tuition.

15. What did you get really, really, really excited about?
My trip to Europe! Getting A's at Hopkins. Getting a position at the University of Utrecht Medical School to do my PhD!

16. What song will always remind you of 2008?
Ghosts by Ladytron

17. Compared to this time last year, are you: a) happier or sadder?  b) thinner or fatter?  c) richer or poorer?
teensy bit happier, a little thinner, and a LOT poorer

18. What do you wish you’d done more of?
Sightseeing in Massachusetts.

19. What do you wish you’d done less of?
Worry about my future, argue with my family.

20. How will you be spending Christmas?
I was in the Illinois with the family.

21. Did you fall in love in 2008?
I did. But thanks to bad timing and our lives going in two completely different directions we decided to do the difficult but necessary thing and say goodbye. I think this is the hardest reality of moving to Europe: leaving the people I love.

22. How many one-night stands?
That's personal information thanks.

23. What was your favorite TV program?
Pushing Daisies. CSI. Lost.

24. Do you hate anyone now that you didn’t hate this time last year?
No but my family sure is trying hard to make me.

25. What was the best book you read?
Microbe Hunters by Paul deKruif.

26. What was your greatest musical discovery?
Ladytron and Apocalyptica.

27. What did you want and get?
Acceptance into grad school. A career path. To prove to myself that not only can I make it at Johns Hopkins, but I can ace it.

28. What did you want and not get?
A certain guy.

29. What was your favorite film of this year?
Tie: Persepolis and Dark Knight.

30. What did you do on your birthday, and how old were you?
I was 26. It was amazing. I went on the Sam Adams Brewery tour with Anne and Erik and then we met all of my wonderful Boston friends at the Milkyway for candlepin bowling and pool and beer and fun.

31. What one thing would have made your year immeasurably more satisfying?
To have the vaccine paper accepted somewhere.

32. How would you describe your personal fashion concept in 2008?
Same as 2007: Wear whatever doesnt make me look like a pudgeball - it involved lots of black.

33. What kept you sane?
My friends!

34. Which celebrity/public figure did you fancy the most?
Well wasnt everyone enamored with Barack? Jon Stewart was pretty awesome too.

35. What political issue stirred you the most?
the same one that always does: the Environment and Global Weirding

36. Who did you miss?
Everyone in Boston. Friends in other countries. My Grampa.

37. Who was the best new person you met?
Marty.

38. Tell us a valuable life lesson you learned in 2008.
Life is not always bunnies and cupcakes.

39. Quote a song lyric that sums up your year.
I'm drawing a blank here. But I do have a quote from a little quote book I have that I ripped out and tacked up on my wall (its even here in Baltimore): "Failure is the mother of success."

anniversary

2008-08-19T23:36:00.002-04:00

holy crap! i totally missed my Ravelry member anniversary!
what an awesome year!

in other news (b/c i never post just one thing at a time) freaking out about the impending move to baltimore. driving myself in the uhaul down on friday. cross your fingers all goes well. havent done much knitting since returning from europe. hopefully that will change once i get settled in my new apt. also, have a bit of a yarn disaster. found silverfish nymphs in some of my (expensive!) yarn. ugh! froze them at -80 C so hoping that killed the nasty little buggers and their eggs!

more later! well ok, more about everything at some point in the near future. and by near i mean before 2 months has elapsed
(:{

Paris update

2008-07-07T09:56:00.002-04:00

so whirlwind rundown: Gent was relaxing and amazing. Brugge was beer and food tastic! Brussels kinda sucked due to a bout of vomiting of unknown origin (food poisening??). and Im now in Paris and its too bad i have to switch hostels today which didnt sound so bad a week ago, but the hostel ive been in for the past 2 days is really nice. its brand new! its the nicest ive been in so far!

the eiffel tour was you know, the eifel tower. but the musee de orsay and the rodin museum were amazing and wonderful, except for all the rude tourists shoving you around just to get a picture of the famous paintings! and they didnt even stop to enjoy the works! they just shoved and took a picture and shoved to move on! rude! did a great walking tour today despite the random rain and crazy town wind that flung sand and dirt everywhere. now i have to get going, have to run off and switch hostels, my new one is in montmartre. i hope its nice too. back to england in only 3 days! cant beleive its all almost over!

Gent - |Brugge update

2008-06-28T06:36:00.002-04:00

just got to Brugge. Gent was awesome. just lovely and amazing. not tiem to discuss will tell later. having hell trying to find a place to stay in brussels. ugh. so i may try the couch surfing thing so that i dont have to go all the way back to gent for the one night before i go to paris, cuz that would stink waaay majorly. and i has no grammer today my mind is fried from travelling. oh and maybe its fried from all the beer, jenever, and frites im having. yum yum

Germany Update

2008-06-24T19:00:00.002-04:00

Currently in Cologne, Germany visiting Karen, a lovely Aussie chica I met in Barcelona. Took a train to Dusseldorf today - quaint little town next to teh Rhine, north of Cologne. The food and the Alt Beir were amazing! Pork sausage and potato salad - holie molie good stuff. Too bad there wasnt much to do in Dusseldorf, but it was very scenic and quite a nice day. Tomorrow I will explore Cologne and sample many kinds of the local brew, Kolsch. And hopefully find me a nice bottle of reisling! oh and Germany is just a really pretty country too. Kinda odd though it feels like the most "American" out of all Europe so far. Just based off the way the people dress and behave in public and such. But still very european which is nice too.

oh and the Dutch are really not nice people during a soccer match, esp when they lose. I'll be here in Germany for tomorrows game vs Turkey, I really hope they win or i might be a little afraid of riots. Plus, I do so like Germany way better more than Turkey. Except for the eternally confusing rail system here - the Dutch really have everyone beat on that! In Holland its cheaper and easier to navigate and they still manage to be on time and have nice and clean trains.

Leaving for Brussels on thursday. having a bit of trouble with train tickets there and hostel reservations, so keep your fingers crossed it gets worked out. Yeah so not planning everything in advance may have freedom but its also a huge hassle. all the hostels are booked up and its such an aggravation to figure this out on the fly. just in case you were wondering..... although, this random trip to germany and not really being "stuck" anywhere is awesome too. so, everything has plus and minus to it.

Hup Holland!

2008-06-21T11:41:00.003-04:00

ok so this whole trip is just one big rollercoaster ride i swear. im feeling much better about Holland now. im all decked out in my orange and blue holland shirt for the big Euro football match tonight. quarter finals holland vs. russia. Hup Holland!!!! going to a pub with some canadian kids i met, should be rediculous. and awesome. being in holland for this match is just going ot be nuts.
yeah so i love Utrecht. i can def see myself here for 3 or 4 years. its so cozy and the canals are beautiful. and the houseboat coffeeshop (place to buy weed) was pretty chill too (i was just looking honestly. but if i was going to buy, it would be from there). And Hema! what a store. its like if Ikea and Target hooked up, got preggers, and had a baby. That baby would be Hema. Just love it. was able to buy some things ive either forgotten or ran out of on the cheap. the hostel here is a bit sketch, but at least most of the people ive met have been really nice. except for creepy spanish dude i my room that decided to sleep above me even though there were empty bunks. yeah....

Also excited to be making a random foray into Germany. Met some nice Aussie and Americans who are interning in Cologne (Koln) and invited me to stay with them. so i am.

holland update

2008-06-20T12:57:00.003-04:00

in Utrecht right now. still not doingso well on these european keyboards.i cant get half the punctuation marks i want. im alive, so far. amsterdam is nuts just nuts. wish i could have been there with friends, it would have been a lot more fun. so when\if i move to holland, people need to come and visit and we will go up to amsterdam.
utrecht is a very lovely town. canals and water everywhere. its like northhampton, only older,and, prettier,and beter. def a college town.just very dutch and lovely. but the hostel im in is a bit sketch. the showers are kinda outside since the building is kinda falling apart.... good thing ive been camping. its like showering in an outhouse. but there are more females here now so i feel a bit better. whenifirst got here it was full of geeky, hippie, smelly, gamer dudes. looks like a place for transients. hoping my stuff is ok up in the creeky room.imsure im just beingparanoid. ah well at least allthe food is free. which i think is why people rate it so high on hostelworld. ah well.
holland is quite lovely though, its def possible i think to live here for 3 years.

also going back and forth with a bit of homesickness. it was really intense after the celtics won and i couldnt watch the game....feeling like im missing out on so much while im gone. feeling like this is the most important summer for me to be in boston and im not there. its my last summer, i should be HOME in BOSTON. wtf am i doing over here [questionmark] i should be looking for apartments in baltimore and enjoying the last bits of my favourite city. instead im spending gobs of money, eating poorly, and cursing trains and planes. i miss my friends, travelling is lonely. i really need to shut the fu$k up and enjoy my vacation, i know.

Barcelona update

2008-06-14T09:43:00.002-04:00

well here i am! barcelona is absolutely magnificent. just beautiful.

first hostel, centric point, was great but they didnt have rooms over the weekend. met some awesome people, drank some san miguel at their bar, caught a cold from some sick people in my room.... typical hostel stuff.
im now at Barcelona Mar for the weekend and def not staying here ever again or for my last days. altho the hostel itself is nice and clean and free lockers good showers and such its a really dangerous area. prostitutes everywhere and a girl in my room was attacked and nearly mugged the other night. so i quickly made some friends and try to not travel alone. but they are leaving so i am going back to centric point after tonight.

tuesday i fly to amsterdam to stay at the flying pig hostel which i hear is the place to be. sweet.

hoping to get to the beach here before i leave but def not going alone. too much hassle.

hope everyone is well and maybe soon ill post some pictures!

London update

2008-06-07T03:51:00.002-04:00

On international flights: i had no idea they fed you! and gave free wine! and this nlittle packet of socks, toothbrush and paste, and eye patch. quite brilliant! they served dinner and breakfast. too bad i didnt know about the wine and took a sleeping pill but it turned out allright as i just passed right out and had a nice nap after the wine. really was quite pleased with British Air.

On hostels: quite dissapointed that the web site was not updated and there was in fact, no bar. but the people were splendid (except for the crazy welsh organic farmer old lady who used to live on the streets as a drugged whore who wanted to talk to ppl all night), shower was actually great, and so far so good. though ive heard quite the horror stories about paris....

on London: really love it. the beer is fabulous, food not bad so far. and the palace! magnificent. Big ben and Westminster! lovely! ok, time to e off now, sorry no pictures today. hoping to get to the Tate today. The National Gallery was wonderful (Divinci!).
cheers friends

dash of this

2008-05-18T21:54:00.005-04:00

dash of that. basically lets go over everything that's happened whilst i've been gone from blogging. i've been so busy!
ready to recap? set? go!
Made the decision to attend Johns Hopkins School of Public Health in the fall and get a 1 yr masters in Molecular Microbiology and Immunology. Accepted Debby's offer to get my PhD in her lab at the University of Utrecht (Holland) after my masters.
Lots of Europe trip planning.
My super awesome birthday. Anne and Erik came up for that - we went to the Sam Adams brewery and started the day off right with free beer after the tour. Then we ate too much yummy food. Climbed a mountain (well ok, Summit Ave). Went candlepin bowling at the Milky Way Lounge with lots of wonderful people. Oh and, holy crap! - I'm now closer to 30 than 20. Feeling old.

Finished first sock and started second (of the pair).
Totally effed up my sisters mittens (They've been a 2 yr wip, ugh) and stopped knitting out of frustration.

Submitted an abstract for the New England TB Retreat and was asked to give a talk too. (stunned that they asked me, a lowly technician, to give a talk but honored. And scared. And where am I going to get the time to prep for a talk too!??). Hired and started training my replacement at work.

Went to the Webs tent sale with the lovely ladies Danielle, Alexis, and Catherine. Money was spent. Projects were planned. Northampton was beautiful and a great day was had by all. Revived my desire to knit crazy new things.

And now for the pictures!

Here's the first sock when it was almost done. I have a huge calf, I know. Its meaty. -Ew - what a word.

Here's some beautiful STR color Mossay that Ariel was kind enough to obtain for me while she was at Sock Camp.

And the stash it grows in the night!

Here is the yarn i ended up with from Webs. One of these days I Will buy yarn for a sweater. Maybe.
We have here a huge cone (for only $3!) of super soft cotton - probably for a blanket and pillow cover its so nice. And another cone - mercerized cotton. Probably going to see if this works for a shawl.
Then we have the Hempathy for The Bag (linking to Grumperina's Bag photoshop explanation).

Super excited that I was able to find the liner material for the Bag as well! I'm stoked to start this project but I think it's going to have to wait until after Europe.

Here is my fabric haul. Goodness me I got a little carried away. In my defense, this is my first major fabric purchase since I was, oh, 16. Most of them are fat quarters destined for knit bags or to line knitted items. Except for the black and white floral pattern at the bottom.
I fell in love with that fabric and immediately SAW the skirt in my head. so I bought it. Problem is, I dont have a sewing machine and dont really know how to sew. But it WILL happen. It must. Inspiration struck. Its going to be a rockabilly style skirt with a black sash around the waist (tying in a bow at the back) and white and black ruffled petticoats peeking out from the bottom. Anyone have a sewing pattern for this type of skirt? Or know where I could get one? Help please!

Well, now I must be off for bed. Tomorrow starts the longest 2 weeks of my life. Sigh. Way too much to do and not enough time to do it.

WIP thursday

2008-04-17T16:25:00.004-04:00

Well I was ultra busy yesterday so I missed out on WIP Weds but I figured I'd post today instead.

As some of you know, I have yet to complete knitting a pair of socks. This is somewhat of an annoyance to my knitting friends who would like ever so much to share in this (apparent) joy with me. I tried once to knit a sock and it didnt go very well (first time with lace, first time with small needles) so I lost interest. But I promised to at least give it a try. So here I am. I'm using Lyon Brand magic stripes yarn (using the stash!) and a pattern I got in my sock knitting kit for my birthday last year something like Beginners socks on a handout from Knitting Pure and Simple. I did a gauge swatch, but it didnt do much good. I have a tendency to cast on very tight, so I CO holding two needles together. I CO the number of stitches the pattern suggested for women's socks, but after about 2 inches into it I could tell they were socks for a bear. Frog frog frog (after looking at my gauge). Start over. Even though I CO the amount of sts my gauge suggested, here I am at about 4 inches in and they still looked like man socks. I decreased 6 sts. Still look like man socks. I am NOT frogging. If they end up man socks then I'll give them to a man.

Here IT is in all its glory.

I hate socks. And I've barely begun one. I dont see how this is supposed to be FUN. Cuz its not.

Oh and I was wait-listed at Drexel in case you are wondering. So cross your fingers I get accepted into the "back-up plan" masters program at Johns Hopkins. Otherwise I'm going to have no career options and no where to go and I'll be insanely depressed. Life sucks.
At least the weather is nice out now. And M passed his nursing boards (I knew he would!). Though it seems our lives are heading in opposite directions so were not sure what "we" are or what we want to be. But at least its fun whatever it is.

Savy Savy He's our man!

2008-04-13T22:07:00.005-04:00

Finally! Bruins won a playoff game against Montreal tonight! Savard scored the game-winner in overtime, Lucic scored the other goal of the game. Wish I coulda' been there! Savard scoring the game-winner was nice b/c he's been out w/ a broken bone in his back, and injury he got after a Montreal player cross-checked him a couple weeks ago. I heart the Stanley Cup Playoffs.
Go Bruins!

heart in throat

2008-04-07T14:30:00.002-04:00

So for the past three weeks I've been eagerly anticipating the decision of Drexel Med. (Remember, I interviewed there in Jan) Two weeks ago, I called the admissions office with questions about the FAFSA, but before I could ask my question the guy on the phone was telling me that decisions were slowly being made, I should be patient, I'll hear from them in the next 2-3 weeks, and dont forget, I can check my status online too. They must get a lot of phone calls regarding admissions decisions this time of the year.
After the guy told me about the online status I've been religiously logging on every other day and checking. Every time it has said that a decision has not yet been made, but to check back. Until today. Today my status said that a decision has been reached and a letter was sent to the preferred address. Cue nervous stomach ache. For the past 10 weeks I've surprised myself with my lack of worry and stress over this matter. Probably b/c I knew there was nothing I could do to speed up the process and theres no point in worrying until I actually get the decision. But now, I know its in the mail and my stomach is in knots. Worse yet is I dont even know what I want the letter to say. I change my mind every day. I suppose having options would be nice. And knowing that I didnt spend gobs and gobs of money for nothing would be nice too. Sigh.....
So the med school moment of truth will soon arrive.....
Coincidentally (or not?) M took his nursing boards today and is convinced he failed. I hope he's wrong.

In other news I bought a ticket to go to Lollapalooza yesterday! Very excited about that! Radiohead, NIN, and a reunited Rage Against the Machine! Nothing better!

i want

2008-03-31T10:59:00.002-04:00

On her LJ Ariel reported that she wanted a huge poster of her DNA (its probably a picture of DNA cut by restriction enzymes). And while I think its neat, its not something I would pay that amount of money for. Something more in my price range is the tee-shirt from Science showing the annotated gene sequence map of human chromosome 1. I want one! Do I Need it? No! But that doesnt stop me from wanting it..... I'll probably refrain, but it would be sweet to have it..... Sigh
I'm such a geek!

Travel Log

2008-03-29T17:23:00.003-04:00

Over the summer this blog will temporarily move from craft/general posting to travel posting. Originally I had intended to go over to Europe for 8-10 weeks and do a Grand Tour of Western Europe, of sorts. Sadly, thanks to the falling economy (the money I have saved is worth less and the price of flights to Europe just tripled) I have to cut it short. I'm hoping for 6 weeks but I think in reality its going to be more like 4 weeks. Which is extremely sucky, but there's really nothing I can do about it. I need to be a responsible adult and not go into ridiculous credit card debt if I run out of money while I'm there. Sigh.
After making this decision, I consoled myself by buying my backpack for the trip. I had my REI Co-Op member 20% off discount for March, and obviously I wanted to use it on the pack. Alexis was kind enough to accompany me and watch my stuff. I had originally hoped to get the biggest pack that would still be reasonable for the trip but as it turned out I had less choice in the matter than most. My tiny 5 foot barely 3 inch frame doesnt allow for comfortable wearing of most packs. But luckily with the help of awesome backpack fitter guy at REI, I was able to find one that fit perfect and still had a decent capacity. I ended up with the Gregory Jade 50 womens size small pack and I Love it! The REI guy showed me how to put it on, what all the straps were for, how to pack it up, and even put in 15 lbs of weights so I could give it a test drive. I'm super excited about my pack now, did I mention that I love it? (:

In other news the Rook has finally stopped hurting like crazy but now it itches like hell. Its annoying, but perfectly normal.
Also, a spring update on the Resolutions: today the scale read the smallest number I've seen in over 2 years! So excited. I'm just 2 lbs away from my pre-diabetes weight (the Byetta is def helping). Too bad all of it has come off of my breasts, arms, and back and not my belly. So I still have a beer gut that I need to work on.
Hopefully I will be casting on a second go at a first sock soon. I've made major progress on the 2 year mittens for my sister, too bad my gauge has changed over the years and I had to rip the new one out. Grrrr.

to leave the country?

2008-03-25T13:18:00.002-04:00

In case you have ever wondered why I want to leave this country so badly..... It's because we're surrounded by idiots, and they piss me off. And they are ruining this country! I don't know who this reporter is, but this is a pretty good piece.
Obama tests America's cult of ignorance

Also, that name personality testy thing I did the other day - I started putting all sorts of names into it, and everyone was a Type -A personality... hmmmm

FO: Brim hat redux

2008-03-24T21:44:00.008-04:00

So last year I attempted to free form a seed stitch brim hat for myself. And true to my status quo of free forming hats, it didnt fit me. However, instead of being way too small, it was way too big. I ended up gifting it to my brother this past christmas (and of course, forgot to get pictures) so it wasnt a total waste, but still, i was sans hat. Then a pattern came out in Magknits that was nearly exactly what I wanted, and I knew I must try it.

Project name: Possibly Hip??
Pattern: Reasonably Hip by Elizabeth Cobbe, free on magknits.com
Yarn: Berroco Ultra Alpaca, charcoal gray
Needles: US size 5 metal circs and same size bamboo dpns

Pattern adjustments: Lots.
The gauge in the pattern was 3.75 st/inch (15 sts = 4" in seed st) but I was using a different yarn and my gauge was 5 st / inch in seed st. So I cast on 81 sts instead of 63. This means I had to re-work the short rows for the hat and the brim.
My hat short rows were as follows:
Row 1: K 45, w&t . . . . . Row 2: K 46, w&t
Row 3: K 47, w&t . . . . . Row 4: K 49, w&t
Row 5: K 53, w&t . . . . . Row 6: K 55, w&t
Row 7: K 57, w&t . . . . . Row 8: K 59, w&t
Row 9: K 61, w&t . . . . . Row 10: K 65
Row 11: K 67, w&t . . . . . Row 12: seed st for 72 sts, w&t
Row 13: seed st for 77 sts, w&t
End of short rows.
Then I knit for 6 inches measured from the front of the hat where there were no short rows.
I followed the pattern for the decreases, just added an extra round before the pattern starts.

For the brim of the hat I cast on 40 sts instead of 34.
Short rows I changed as follows:
Top visor
Row 1: work 2x2 rib for 30 sts, w&t
Row 2: work 2x2 rib for 20 sts, w&t
Row 3: 24 sts . . . . . . Row 4: 28 sts
Row 5: 31 sts . . . . . . Row 6: 34 sts
Row 7: 35 sts . . . . . . Row 8: 36 sts
Row 9: 37 sts . . . . . . Row 10: 38 sts
Row 11: 39 sts . . . . . . Row 12: 40 sts
End short rows. Continue 2x2 rib over all sts for 4 more rounds.
Bottom visor:
Pick up and knit center 20 sts from front edge of visor.
Row 1 (ws): p20, cast on 10 sts
Row 2 (rs): k30, cast on 10 sts, should have 40 sts
Row 3: p30, w&t . . . . . Row 4: k24, w&t
Row 5: p28, w&t . . . . . Row 6: k31, w&t
Row 7: p34 . . . . . . . Row 8: k35
Row 9: p36 . . . . . . . Row 10: k37
Row 11: p38 . . . . . . . Row 12: k39
Row 13: p40
end of short rows. continue in stockinette over all sts for 4 more rows.

Notes: the pattern never explicitly states where to join the hat and begin to work in the round. i found out the hard way that you are supposed to join immediately and do the short rows in the round (otherwise it makes no sense).
Also, having 6 inches of hat measured from the front edge is a bit long for my taste and you'll notice in the pictures that i'm rolling the back brim of the hat. I'm ok with that, it gives it a unique look but in the future I wouldnt make brimmed hats so long b/c then you have to pull them down so far on your face you cant see a damn thing. Other than that, i'm pretty happy with the pattern and the result.

trouble

2008-03-22T19:55:00.005-04:00

saw this on Amanda's blog, had to steal it.
Apparently I'm the good kind of trouble, hehe.
I have to say its pretty good.... What does everyone think?

What Cassandra Means

You are very open. You communicate well, and you connect with other people easily.

You are a naturally creative person. Ideas just flow from your mind.

A true chameleon, you are many things at different points in your life. You are very adaptable.

You are usually the best at everything ... you strive for perfection.

You are confident, authoritative, and aggressive.

You have the classic "Type A" personality.

You are the total package - suave, sexy, smart, and strong.

You have the whole world under your spell, and you can influence almost everyone you know.

You don't always resist your urges to crush the weak. Just remember, they don't have as much going for them as you do.

You are very intuitive and wise. You understand the world better than most people.

You also have a very active imagination. You often get carried away with your thoughts.

You are prone to a little paranoia and jealousy. You sometimes go overboard in interpreting signals.

You are balanced, orderly, and organized. You like your ducks in a row.

You are powerful and competent, especially in the workplace.

People can see you as stubborn and headstrong. You definitely have a dominant personality.

You are wild, crazy, and a huge rebel. You're always up to something.

You have a ton of energy, and most people can't handle you. You're very intense.

You definitely are a handful, and you're likely to get in trouble. But your kind of trouble is a lot of fun.

What's Your Name's Hidden Meaning?

scary

2008-03-20T22:57:00.000-04:00

have you ever thought that you were being very careful about the information you put on the internets about yourself? that you were making sure there wasnt a complete story of you out there? and then you are bored and go googling shit and it turns out that you are an idiot and if someone tries hard enough they could probably steal your identity or find you to stalk you or some other crazy *ss sh*t? yeah well now i'm terrified. and i have to go around seeing if i can delete stuff. grrrrrrr
seriously i should just get a shirt w/ my name on it like they used to make us wear in elementary school for gym. better yet, i'll put my address and birthdate on it too. and wear it when i go to the bar.

i actually finished knitting my reasonable hip hat but just havent had a spare moment at work to post about it. and internet at home has been tricky tricky.

WIP monday

2008-03-17T16:46:00.003-04:00

I've been feverishly working on my reasonably hip hat and I've finally finished the hat body. All i have left is the brim. I tried it on last night and took a picture.

It comes down a bit far for the brim but I think it will be ok anyhow. a little wiggle room. i guess we'll find out after i attach the brim - hopefully tonight!
also, my hair looks insanely red in this picture..... odd. I already like the way that the short rows make the hat curve down the ears though, so that's good.

In other news i'm so not excited about a drinking holiday landing on a work night. booo to that. i'll probably still go out for a Guinness or two, but it wont be nearly as fun a night as it could have been.
Completely forgot to tell the yarners about what happened knit related in Georgia. One of the scientists (JR) I was visiting has a 1.5 yr old daughter. When she was born I knit her a blanket. We stopped at JR's house before a lab dinner out and her daughter was still awake. She was talkative but tentative towards all the new people in the house. Then JR said to her daughter "You know your blanket? The red one you like so much? Well, Cassandra knit it for you." Blank stare from daughter. "Yes, Cassandra made the red blanket for you when you were born." Daughter: "Yay!!! Yay, yay, yay, yay" (she yelled it while jumping up and down). After that the daughter decided I was awesome and kept coming up to me and talking to me and giving me toys.
Honestly, it was one of the best responses I've gotten from knitting a gift because it was such a surprise. I really didnt expect her to react that way. But apparently she loves the blanket, so thats good.

Funky Georgia Demise

2008-03-14T15:26:00.011-04:00

Well since this post is about 3 things I decided to combine them all into one title.
Funky sneakers.
Georgia business trip.
Untimely Demise of a wonderful crochet hook.

You may recall my yearning for some new funky sneakers a couple weeks ago. Well, I took the plunge and ordered some off the internets after not being able to find anything good in local stores. They arrived right before I headed down to GA and I'm just in love. They are the awesomest. And I'm so glad they fit since they were limited addition and I had to order them in men's sizing and hope they fit.
Since my sneaks are so ridiculously good looking, I thought they merited two pictures.

Next on the agenda is the trip to Athens and then Atlanta GA. Nothing too fun and exciting in either place but I did get to stay in a hotel for one night and it was a tribute to Frank Lloyd Wright so the architecture and design of the place were pretty amazing (Emory Conference Center). Everything about it, down to the light fixtures and pillows were designed with Wright in mind and I think that it was a fitting tribute. I had a balcony overlooking a beautiful courtyard where I had planned to sit and eat my breakfast (room service! for the first time!) but sadly it was cold and rainy when I woke up. Sigh. Only 1 day of warm sunny weather made for a bummer of a trip. It even snowed the last day I was there! Which of course freaked the sh*t out of the Atlanta airport and caused massive delays.

Swanky bathroom and view from balcony. And only one night to enjoy it.

After having been gone for what seemed like forever my lovely fellow Yarners and I were finally able to get most of the group together for some knitting at Panera this week, where I worked on my almost completed Reasonably Hip hat. It was during our little SnB session that I discovered the horrible and untimely demise of a wonderful little crochet hook that had lived in my wip bag for quite some time. The sizeless, brandless, and possibly ageless hook was my great grandmothers and I inherited it with the rest of her collection of semi-antique hooks of various sizes and materials. (she started to crochet around 1910 and stopped in the 1980's and her hooks aren't exactly dated so I'm not sure how old they are). The little red plastic wonder was, before its death, the perfect size to quick fix any knitting mistakes. I adored it. But I suppose a possibly 90 year old plastic hook just cannot last forever stuffed in my wip bag and carted all around the country. Sigh.
In other news I went to go see Persepolis with M (new guy alert!) right before I left for Georgia - it was really good despite its abrupt ending. I highly recommend it. After I returned we watched Shaun of the Dead, which was really quite hilarious for a British zombie movie. Also managed to chat on the phone for 4 hours!?! and barely notice that it was that long. Feels like high school or early college all over again, but in a silly, laughy, fun way. (:{

the needle tears a hole

2008-02-28T11:52:00.006-05:00

I hurt myself today
to see if i still feel
i focused on the pain
the only thing that's real
the needle tears a hole
the old familiar sting
try to kill it all away
but i remember everything

Pain and I have a funny relationship. I've had migraines for nearly all my life (diagnosed at age 9) and so pain, excruciating want to die pain, has been more a part of my life than the average person. For some strange reason I think this has actually caused me to like some kinds of pain. It kinda feels rewarding to endure self inflicted pain , I almost want to shout "I win!" I'm not saying I go around cutting myself or punching myself (that would be altogether weirder than I can handle) but I have a long history of piercing and tattooing my body. I've been quite introspective about my migraines and pain lately, mostly because there is a new blog on the New York Times discussing migraine and issues around it. I think its great that this neurological disease is finally being accepted as a major issue by doctors and the general public, even if I don't always agree with what the bloggers are saying. For instance, several contributors to the NYT blog make it seem as though they are grateful for their migraines, and espouse all the wonderful things resulting from them (ie: the feeling of euphoria, clearheadedness, refreshment, and creativity that often comes after a migraine has successfully ended). I'm sorry, but I'd give that up in an instant if I could just never have a migraine again.

So that's my long winded explanation of my weird relationship with pain. Now why am I discussing this today? Why do I have Trent's wonderful voice singing Hurt stuck in my head?

Because last night I got my rook pierced. I haven't had anything pierced in 8 years and ever since I saw a girl with her rook and conch pierced I've been itching to pierce something. So I did my research and decided to go to Stingray Body Art over in Allston, hoping that I could get Abbey Z since there were so many raving reviews of her online. Just my luck she was there last night. I went by myself since for some reason it HAD to be last night and no one was available to accompany me. Well, its a good thing Abbey was so awesome b/c I did end up getting dizzy when she was putting the ring in. The actual piercing didnt hurt that bad and was quick, its always after that I get the spins. So she sat and chatted with me until I felt better. Also, major props to the studio - they were super clean, everything was autoclaved, and they understand sterility. As in, you change your gloves if you touch something unsterile. So I would def recommend going there for any piercing you are thinking of getting.

Now this would be an awfully boring post if I didnt actually include pictures, right? (:
Here we go, side by side before and after pics of my left ear.

Lovely Day and old ceramic FO's

2008-02-26T13:41:00.010-05:00

hey! its been a lovely day! everything is going my way
i had so much fun today and i'm on fire

I've had the Dresden Dolls song Good Day in my head ever since I left the doctor's office this morning. And that's kinda odd for me, having a good day so early and after a visit to the doctor at that! So I just had to share. But I didnt want to keep posting about life only so I finally got around to photoshopping collages of some of the ceramic Raku FO from the first time I tried Raku.
So why is it such a good day? Well, I wore my brand spankin new coat, North Face Apex Bionic, and it rocks. Then, I found out I've lost 8 lbs since starting Byetta in November and my A1c is as low as its ever been so I'm super stoked. I dont think I've ever heard any of my diabetes dr's say "Wow, way to go, good job!" Resolution 2 is all set (just have to keep it up) and Resolution 1 is well on the way. (even despite my friday night drinking habit, or maybe b/c of it?) And its not even March! Have I mentioned I'm on fire?

Speaking of fire, lets talk about Raku. Raku is sooo much fun. You glaze the pots with special, partly dangerous glazes (heavy metals anyone??). Then you pop them into a kiln, and heat it super hot. I'm pretty sure we were doing ours to Cone 06 which is roughly 1800 F. Then you open the kiln while its still hot, take your pieces out using special tongs - and wearing lots of protective gear - so you dont burn yourself or set on fire. Then you put your piece into a metal bin full of combustibles (wood chips, newspaper) and after they set on fire you put a lid on it. oooh Fire! Then you wait for it all to cool off and then clean all the soot off your stuff.
The pieces below are ok. Not super exciting or good, but they gave me an idea of what its all about.

Here we have a small vase with a green crackly glaze on the outside and a white crackly glaze on the inside. I'm not a fan of the green dripping into the white on the inside, but other than that its pretty neat.

Here we have an example where too many different glazes killed the piece. But the flash of color like an oil spot gave me hope of using the one glaze again and trying for that specific effect.

I think the glaze came out nice on this one despite it being a dumpy looking object. I like the range of green I can get with varying thickness of glaze.

This one is by far my favourite. The color is better than the pictures depict. Its mustard yellow with black cracks. It reminds me of a lion. And I had some fun constructing this sort of wacky combo of a thrown/hand built object so I'm glad the glaze suits it.

Evening edit: day got even better. Moved up to 10 lb free weights today and they didnt strain the neck. Bergeron is back on skates! AND the Bruins shut out the evil Senators tonight 4-0. Oh what a night!

Today is brought to you by the letter: E

2008-02-22T11:46:00.003-05:00

Eclipses and Envirosax!
And Photoshop of course.

Well on weds night as I'm sure most of you know there was a lunar eclipse. I missed the last one so I was glad that my Yarners reminded me of this one. Luckily I could see it off the back of my porch. Before I went to see it I decided to try and find the night function I knew was on my camera but just couldn't seem to find myself by trial and error. So I finally gave up and read the manual. And of course I (re)discovered all the other awesome functions for snow, fireworks, beaches, etc that I could have been playing around with all this time. Oh well, better lat than never huh?
Anyway the eclipse was major awesome!

Here are some pictures of the progression of the eclipse. Using the flash on my camera caused the one on the top right to be yellow-ish and without the flash I got the blue-ish glow. Neat huh? The only photoshopping done to these pics is that I cropped them and put 4 together. No sharpening or color enhancement. Pretty good for a basic point and shoot digital camera, I think.

Last night while picking up a copy of the H.R. Giger book on sale at the Booksmith for Ariel (I already had one for myself! Ahh - spending monies!) I broke down and bought an Envirosax. I had seen them several times and finally the guilt of always getting plastic bags at the Booksmith when others were using these little fellas got to me. Oh the guilt. Damn you Brookline and all your conscientiousness! I already have a couple canvas bags that I use to go grocery shopping, but they are pretty bulky and dont fold up small enough to carry around every day. And I often stop at either Trader Joes or CVS or the Booksmith after work and I hate always using more plastic bags. So I guess its a good investment. And trendy. (Ahh - more spending monies!)

You can see that it rolls down into almost nothing and it is super light so it adds almost nothing to the weight of a purse or bag. So now it lives in my bag that I carry to work.
And now I can shop with a little less guilt! Always a bonus!

Although, all this spending monies still hasnt quelled my desires for a new coat and for new funky sneakers. Sigh.

WIP RSI??

2008-02-19T16:53:00.005-05:00

So I have been working quite feverishly on my giftie scarf since Andreas's birthday was last friday, and I think I may have a Repetitive Stress Injury to show for my efforts (besides an almost done scarf). My left hand pointer finger knuckle hurts like mad and since there is no visible bruise, and its been hurting since friday when the hardcore knitting began, I think its knitting related pains and not accidental whacking into something pains. So I think to solve this problem I need to knit faster so I can be done with it and move on to a new project (:{
Like a hat for my poor cold head.

Here is the progress as of Saturday. Its actually a lot longer but I couldnt get a good picture of it.

Speaking of cold body parts and hats, well, ok, speaking of outer clothing, I've decided I need a new coat. My current coats are 5 and 2 years old. And neither are quite appropriate for this new, warmer, winter due to the Global Weirding. The pea coat is more of a "nice" coat and as such I dont want to be wearing it every day. The Columbia coat is for super duper cold weather (the kind we used to have here all winter long) and I've been sweltering and sweating profusely in it. Which, oddly, doesn't stop my forehead and ears from freezing off. I have also come to loathe the Columbia jacket due to purchasing idiocy on my part. I really dont know what kind of drugs I was on when I decided to buy a lavender colored coat in size large. I dont like lavender. I want black. I stick out like a weirdo on city streets in a giant lavender coat. When its too warm to be wearing a giant coat. whine whine and yes i'd like some cheese with it. I also thought I'd need extra room for all those bulky sweaters I'd be wearing except for the fact that it no longer is arctic winter here (well, ok, we still get air streams from the arctic, but they are warmer now) and the coat itself is so damn warm that I cant wear sweaters with it. So its huge for no reason.

So goodbye resolution #5, hello new coat when my tax rebate arrives.

Also, tomorrow I will be saying goodbye to Flat Stanley who was sent to me by Jonathon (sisters-fiances-son) for his kindergarten project. Flat Stan had a good time here in Boston and in Philly and now its time to go back to the Illinois and tell his story to Jonathon's class.

Here is "Pocket Stan" hanging out in his fav spot in my coat.

One of the neater picts taken of Stan at Trinity Church on a fun day out with Anne.

Stan at a marker for Elfreth's Alley, the oldest residential street in the USA in Philly.

Bye Stan! Hope you had fun!

the day after

2008-02-15T09:18:00.003-05:00

Well, yesterday was my first true test of Resolution #7 and I have to say, I passed with flying colors. Not only did I refrain from opening a bottle of wine (which Always leads to finishing the bottle of wine) but I also refrained from drinking all my beer. In fact, I didn't drink at all.

I did, however, totally wipe out on a patch of ice on my way to the gym, and feel a little pathetic for staying so long at the gym w/ all the muscle dudes (most people were running in and running back out again), so the day wasn't totally awesome. But at least I'm not so pathetic to answer the requisite e-mail from an ex-boyfriend on Valentines. Seriously, if any guys read this, stop e-mailing old flames on Valentines day, esp if you've already emailed them in the past and they no longer answer!! Gah! This time it sounded like he's on some sort of 12-step program and needs to apologize to everyone he may have hurt. It was weird.

Anyhow, in the past couple days I've made major progress on my exchequered giftie so hopefully it will be done soon!

Sneak Peeks

2008-02-11T13:54:00.001-05:00

Without internet at home its been hard to find time at work to sneak a post. I am *eventually going to post a long sad story regarding the Endpaper mitts and all their woe, but just like I was procrastinating fixing them and finishing them, I am procrastinating writing that post. But, they ARE FINISHED. Which is a huge accomplishment in and of itself.
As proof, see sneak peek picture below.

Pretty colors distract from the real danger these mitts pose.

One good thing (among many) to come out of the completion of the Endpaper's is that I've finally gotten my knitting mojo back! For the first time in a long time I actually Want to knit.
And what is it that I'm staying up late to work on lately? Why a scarf giftie. Its a double - knit scarf and I've heavily modified the pattern, but so far its coming along splendidly. Hopefully it will be completede soon and I'll have more FO goodness. After this I'm going to work on some mittens for my sister that I started ~2 years ago and a hat for myself. B/c my poor head is cold.

Checked goodness!

* A mid Feb update on other life type things:
Had an interview at Drexel Med, I think it went really well. I'll hopefully hear from them in 6 weeks or so.
The weight loss was going well (I had lost 3 lbs since Dec) until this past week where I did a complete 180 and gained it all back. Which nearly sent me to tears in the gym on the scale. After seeing the numbers slowly go down since November it has been heart wrenching to see them inching back up for the past 2 weeks. I really hope I can get back on track and reverse this recent trend. (And no, its not muscle gained. I'm back to not being able to fit in my clothes. And besides I'm not doing any weight lifting right now).
I made an appointment with a physical therapist for my neck and shoulder, hopefully my insurance will decide to cover therapy so I can get back to weightlifting and have less migraine from neck strain.
My Uncle made it through brain cancer surgery and is amazingly not paralyzed. Chemo / radiation will start soon.
Still dont know if it was sepsis or endotoxemia that killed my mice.
Spent some quality time with Amanda who was visiting Boston this weekend and bought some nifty fabric that I hope to one day make into WIP bags.
OK, back to work!

hey, can we stop?

2008-01-18T23:59:00.000-05:00

I've had a very trying week. i know life is hard and such but really. come on. a girl can only handle so much. no internet at home (i know horrible!). the mice i immunized with vaccines i've used before went into shock and sepsis and are dying. its so horrible ive never seen anything like it and we tried frantically to save them (couldnt) and tried frantically to collect as much data as possible as to why it was happening. today i thought finally the week is over i can take a one day break and breathe b/c Anne is visiting tomorrow and i dont even have to think about the horror awaiting me at work. but then i got a call from my mom. my favorite uncle has brain cancer. doctors gave him 3 weeks if they dont operate. they are operating monday. they're not sure he'll make. its a fast growing primary cancer that's eating his brain at an alarming rate. i mean seriously. its not bad enough i have to watch my poor mice suffer and die and am helpless to stop it? emotionally, i think i might explode.
and no, i havent been knitting. my poor little brain cannot process.

odd thoughts, weird musings

2008-01-06T00:31:00.000-05:00

Not sure if my thoughts are currently odd, but considering my recent bout of insomnia, everything seems to me odd at the moment.

A couple nights ago I tried again to get into Armand Marie Leroi's book about human Mutants and genetic variety and sadly it failed to put me to sleep or to stir up my booklust (booklust = the NEED to read a certain book until its finished due to its fabulousness). I dunno, maybe I'm just not excited by genetics right now. I've been trying to find a book I could lust over without actually buying a new book since A. I own plenty of un-read books, B. I'm broke, and C. I miss reading, but nothing has struck my fancy. Until friday that is. On fri I saw my PI and he gave us our christmas presents (I left town to early to get it before), and since its always a book, I knew it would be a book. In the elevator down from his office I tore into the wrapping and squealed with glee to my coworkers that I had wanted this book- I just kept forgetting to buy it. And now I have a serious case of booklust. I dont think I've been so excited about a book since the last great book of 2007 (A Feast for Crows), which I read forever ago. And what is this book?? Microbe Hunters by Paul De Kruif (orig pub 1926 and w/ a new intro by F. Gonzalez-Crussi). Its pretty much a classic in microbiology and its interesting enough that I think pretty much anyone would like it. There's a lot of really neat info in it about all of the original discoverers (some who are more obscure than they deserve to be) of all things too small to see w/ the naked eye. I especially love that De Kruif and all of the first hunters call the things "wee beasties" and "animalcules." Tee hee

I try to not follow presidential races too far in advance because I personally think our politicians should be doing their tax-paid jobs instead of campaigning constantly for 2 years but since the MA primary is coming up in Feb I have of late been trying to decide who to vote for. (Disclaimer - if you are a relative or close friend do not continue reading. I'm following my fathers' philosophy that politics and family do not mix and can cause ridiculous pointless arguments) Lately I've been back and forth between John Edwards and Barack Obama. Now, its not that I think we shouldn't or couldn't have a women in office, and its not that I dont like Hilary, I'm fine with her, I just dont think that she has the power to win. And really folks, this time we Liberals need a winner. Its pretty clear that our country has gone to shit under the idiots currently running the show and if we want to avoid irreparable damage we need a winner this time around.
So just for fun I did the candidate calculator I found on Amanda's blog and to my surprise the candidate I most identify w/ on issues is Dennis Kucinich. Then comes Christopher Dodd, Mike Gravel, Clinton, Joseph Biden, Obama, and finally Edwards to round out the Dems. Obviously I really didnt match w/ any of the reds. Now, does this mean I'm likely to change my vote - not really because I personally think that only Obama, Edwards, and Clinton have enough "star power" to make it out of the primaries.
I think that an Obama/Edwards ticket would be very powerful and hey wouldn't it be neat if we had a black president from Illinois, the same state that produced President Lincoln who abolished slavery?

Ok, so political diatribe is over. whew, what a long winded post about nothing this is.

FO: white snowflake star ornaments

2008-01-02T21:24:00.000-05:00

Last year I made ornaments for just about all of my family members (grandparents, aunts/uncles/cousins, etc) using heavy card stock and embossing (one day i'll post some pictures - it was pre-dig camera so I dont have a picture of all of them sadly), it was painstaking work and for some reason I decided to make ornaments again. And I started like 2 weeks before Christmas, stupid me! Sigh. I dont know why I'm such a masochist.

Project Name: white snowflake-star ornaments
Pattern: Snowflake Star by Judy Gibson, free Here
Yarn: J&P Coates Knit-Cro-Sheen Size 10 crochet cotton, white
Needles: US size 2 metal dpns
Pattern adjustments: None. Made 5 pointed stars with 5 repeats.
Notes: Although I am still not a huge fan of the Emily Ocker cast on, I continue to use it. I found this site with pictures to be very helpful in learning the cast on. I also think that it might not be such a bad technique if we didnt have to cast on 12 stitches! I might try 6 and just do one more round of yarn-overs next time just to see what it looks like. Also, the closer I got to Christmas the less time and less yarn I had so I started to make 4 and 3 repeat stars. Which came out quite nicely as well I just dont have pictures of them for comparison. (I do have pictures of the smaller stars in the silver yarn but that's a separate post). I also used Niagara starch I picked up at CVS for less than $2. I pinned the stars out, sprayed on the starch, made sure all parts of the stars were wet, and re-pinned the wet stars with a little more stretch. After about an hour I ironed the back of them to quicken the process so I could get some off the board to pin out more. I found that for the all cotton stars this worked quite well and they kept their shape and once dry in the morning had just the right amount of stiffness. (different story for the ones with silver ribbon running through them)
They also took a long time b/c I had to consciously think about not knitting too tight or binding off too tight or the star looked scrunched and didnt block nicely. So I am considering using larger needles in the future to help this out. It also might make it look "lacier."
Anyway here are some pictures for your enjoyment!

The blue snowflake in the left corner is a crochet one gifted to me (:{

Not so extreme close-up!

2007 Year in Review Quiz

2008-01-01T18:43:00.001-05:00

Just one last 2007 ditty and then we can get back to the FO parade. w00t. I stole this from Amanda btw.

1. What did you do in 2007 that you’d never done before?
Dyed yarn; learned to crochet; threw closed-top ceramic objects; a couple of different sex positions; picked berries; pet an Alpaca.

2. Did you keep your new year’s resolutions, and will you make more for next year?
I did not make resolutions last year but I did make some this year.

3. Did anyone close to you give birth?
Two of my cousins had kids.

4. Did anyone close to you die?
Sadly, yes. My Grampa died a couple weeks ago (Mom's dad).

5. What countries did you visit?
None, booo.

6. What would you like to have in 2008 that you lacked in 2007?
A career path.

7. What dates from 2007 will remain etched upon your memory, and why?
The day I met Kev, the day I got my tattoo, the day my Grampa died -- all for obvious reasons.

8. What was your biggest achievement of the year?
Getting published for the first time.

9. What was your biggest failure?
Being rejected from medical schools, twice.

10. Did you suffer illness or injury?
I was incredibly ill the first two weeks in January, I was in the hospital last New Years Eve.

11. What was the best thing you bought?
My digital camera and my Zen V Plus!!

12. Whose behavior merited celebration?
Nothing particularly strikes me.

13. Whose behavior made you appalled and depressed?
El presidente and many other american politicians

14. Where did most of your money go?
Rent, medical school application fees.

15. What did you get really, really, really excited about?
Being published in a scientific journal.

16. What song will always remind you of 2007?
Starlight by Muse

17. Compared to this time last year, are you: a) happier or sadder?  b) thinner or fatter?  c) richer or poorer?
teensy bit happier, a lot fatter, and a lot poorer

18. What do you wish you’d done more of?
Bicycling in the summer, exercising in general, being out in the sun on nice days.

19. What do you wish you’d done less of?
Worry about my future, argue with my family.

20. How will you be spending Christmas?
I was in the Illinois with the family.

21. Did you fall in love in 2007?
I did, even though I never told him, and fate is keeping us on separate continents, its ok b/c he proved to me that I dont need to lower my standards to find who I'm looking for. (This could be a bummer in the short term considering I havent gone on any dates since he left).

22. How many one-night stands?
That's personal information thanks.

23. What was your favorite TV program?
Well that would be different depending on the season. First Deadliest Catch, then Planet Earth, then Pushing Daisies.

24. Do you hate anyone now that you didn’t hate this time last year?
I dont think so.

25. What was the best book you read?
A Feast for Crows by George RR Martin

26. What was your greatest musical discovery?
Muse and Silversun Pickups

27. What did you want and get?
To prove that insufflation of mice works.

28. What did you want and not get?
Acceptance into medical school.

29. What was your favorite film of this year?
Tie: Pan's Labyrinth and 300.

30. What did you do on your birthday, and how old were you?
I was 25 and I went to my favourite restaurant with my favourite people. It was probably one of the best birthday's I can remember.

31. What one thing would have made your year immeasurably more satisfying?
To have the TB paper accepted somewhere, and to live in the same vicinity as Kev so we could have actually had a real relationship.

32. How would you describe your personal fashion concept in 2007?
Wear whatever doenst make me look like a pudgeball - it involved lots of black.

33. What kept you sane?
My friends! And my co-workers who are friends!

34. Which celebrity/public figure did you fancy the most?
fancy? as in think is cute? or just like? ummmmm well I always like Johnny Depp

35. What political issue stirred you the most?
the same one that always does: the Environment and Global Weirding

36. Who did you miss?
Everyone who doesnt live near me: Kev, my brother and sister, Anne, Amanda, Liz.
My old bosses Sam and Jyothi.
My Grampa.

37. Who was the best new person you met?
Kevin fo' sho'

38. Tell us a valuable life lesson you learned in 2007.
Even if you've wanted something since you were 3, when you cant have it, it may turn out that you dont actually want it anymore.

39. Quote a song lyric that sums up your year.
"Follow through / make your dreams come true / dont give up the fight / you will be all right / because there's no one like you in the universe // Dont be afraid / of what your mind conceives / you should make a stand / stand up for what you beleive"
Invincible by Muse

Add One

2008-01-01T10:37:00.001-05:00

I need to add a resolution.

7. I will not get drunk as a skunk if I'm home alone and feeling lonely. It only leads to depression and irrational behaviour.

Resolutions

2007-12-31T17:43:00.000-05:00

Well, I suppose since it is New Years Eve I should make some resolutions. I didnt make any last year so I have nothing to review. I read somewhere that resolutions that are specific are more likely to be followed so I'll give it a go.

1. Lose 11 lbs to be back to the weight I was before diabetes.
2. Have better control of the diabetes. Specifically, get my A1c down to 6.4 or below.
3. Keep in touch better w/ faraway friends. ie: send birthday cards on time.
4. Learn to knit socks.
5. Manage money better and spend less.
6. Knit from my stash at least every other project.

Well, I think that should do it. Lets hope I can do it (:{

FO: Felted bag for sister

2007-12-31T14:16:00.000-05:00

Well, it's been a long time since I posted a knitted FO on here, so hurrah, finally here is one. I started this bag ages ago as a mindless knit to knit when I got bored with other projects. As Christmas neared and all it needed was to be felted I thouhgt it would make a good gift for my sister (I also thought it would make a good birthday gift for her back in September, but it was no where near finished then).

Project name: Felted bag for Vickie
Pattern: Sophie free on Magknits
Yarn: cascade 220 in grey (dont have the tag anymore so I dont know the actual color code or dyelot)
Needles: 10.5 metal circs and metal dpns
Pattern adjustments: Used US size 10.5 instead of 10 needles. Also made the bag slightly bigger and the handles slightly longer. I also used the remainder yarn to knit up a rectangle (stockinette bordered by garter) to use as a pocket.
Notes: I felted this one the same as the other Sophie I made but it came out completely different. I felted as follows: put in pillow case and tie off. Run through hot wash cycle w/ dirty jeans and a little detergent, then cold rinse cycle. Run another hot wash/cold rinse with no detergent. Open pillow case and check.
The other Sophie I made I used the color of Cascade indicated in the pattern and it turned out wonderfully. This gray yarn felted much differently, SIGH. It came out much smaller than intended and so the handles ended up being shorter than I wanted. It was also thicker than I wanted. And the rectangle for the cellphone pocket was thick and small too. SO it must have felted faster/easier than the yellow-green and thus 2 cycles was overkill. Once again I'm learning things the hard way -- ALWAYS CHECK the felting after each wash/rinse cycle!

Here is the front of the bag.

This cute bead is hiding the stitches that show on the outside from attaching a snap closure. Cute though.

Here is a picture of the back. You can faintly make out the cell phone pocket that I sewed on after felting. Not sure if an actual cell phone will fit in this tiny pocket though.

Even though it didnt turn out as I planned it my sister did like it so that's good.

Holiday Catch Up

2007-12-29T23:55:00.000-05:00

Well now that I'm back from the apathetic void known as my parents house and I'm (shock!) not sick (yet!) I can start updating on my life and my FO's, and proceed with the year-end wind down.

Here is the courtyard of my apartment the day after our first big storm. it looked much the same the day I left Boston except it was snowing like crazy and a couple more inches were on the ground. I would have taken pictures of the somewhat sunny storm the day I left but I had a million bags in my hands and I was trying to make it to the airport (relatively) dry and on time. Or, just in time to be delayed for 6 hours!

Yay nekkid yarn pictures! Here is my Christmas present from Andreas. Very nice wool in a wonderful colorway. He knows me too well! (:{

Close -up of yarny goodness!!

Here is a picture of my sister's fiance's kid, or, my step-nephew-to-be, we'll just call him Jonathon. That's the cats sleeping box and he's proving that he fits inside. I have some nice pictures of the kid when he was in a good mood (he can be such a crankypants!) b/c he hung around me a lot. And that's a big part of why I didn't get much done. I was too busy reading and playing games w/ my new best friend. Its kinda hard to say no to a cute kid who follows you around like a puppy. At least he likes me, it could be worse.

The day after Christmas my sister and I did our usual retail trip to downtown Chicago. This year we didnt buy much due to budgetary constraints but it was nice to just be down there on a beautiful day. Here is a reflection of some skyscrapers in the giant mirrored Bean.

And here is the view looking straight up into the underbelly of the Bean. neat huh?

Other than that everything was pretty low key. Had a nice Christmas other than having a migraine the day of, sigh. But everyone loved their knitted snowflakes so that's good. Still have some Holiday cards to send out though. I'm so behind on everything this year!! Definitely a little lonely here in Boston w/ no one else around!

ooops I did it again

2007-12-16T23:17:00.000-05:00

once again I have knit up a christmas gift, way too close to deadline (I'm leaving town weds), from a pattern I invented in my head. and once again, its so small it might not even fit a child's head. this one is possibly fixable as the strands between the colors were too tight, and the different colors are spaced apart, so I could just cut all of the strands that i carried along and weave them in, allowing for the garment to stretch to its full potential. however, that is a heck of a lot of work. so before i do all of that i'm going to gift the hat. b/c what if the recipient doesn't like it? anyhow, i'd show a picture that would better explain all of this, but the person may be reading this. so full explanations will be had at the end of this week.
bah!!
maybe this will teach me......
never knit on a deadline from a pattern you invent in your head.

I also had some Very Serious Issues with the ill-fated Endpaper's today. I effed up the kitchener bind-off in a major way and lost some stitches off the needles. sigh. maybe today was just not a good day to knit. maybe my brain is too cluttered to knit complicated patterns. whatever happened to knitting for relaxation? its never good when your knitting stresses you out.
And today was one of those days that I really needed Something to go right. B/c it was such a downer. Thanks to the nor'easter and warm temps there is nothing but flood and slush in addition to the snow piles outside. and as i was walking to work to pour some plates i was drenched completely in road slush by motorists speeding unsafely down longwood ave. not once, not twice, but four times! by the time i got to hsph i was ready to cry and freezing and drenched in dirty water. b/c it isnt bad enough that i had to go to work on a crappy sunday. thank you masshole drivers. i hope karma is a giant bucket of sewage that drops on your head. luckily i have access to the mouse breeding facility that has clean scrubs.

Blizzard!!

2007-12-13T22:56:00.000-05:00

Well, today I was planning on going to the Harvard Ceramics Program Holiday Show and Sale opening night, but, the weather predictions turned out to be true and traffic was worse than I thought so I walked home. Except that by 4 pm there was a foot of snow on the ground and nothing had been shoveled or plowed and the snow was still falling like crazy!! And me being me I didnt believe the weather prediction so I left all my perfectly good snow gear at home. At least I was wearing ankle boots or the 1.5 miles home would have been even worse. Really quite amazing how much snow fell in just a few hours.

These pictures are from my balcony around 5 pm tonight.

But I did get some secret holiday knitting done. Yay! And since its another pattern from my head I'm crossing my fingers and praying that it turns out alright and not like the hat I tried to make for my brother's girlfriend last Christmas. We shall see.

update and thanks

2007-12-10T22:16:00.000-05:00

Just wanted to say thanks again to everyone for offering their condolences. (realized of course after the last post that ive been spelling it as granpa and everyone else in the fam spells it grampa. ah well). i'm back from Chicago now. and i've caught a cold of course. been working on lots of snowflakes and about to start some holiday knitting (i swore i had size 8 needles but could not for the life of me find them before i left for my trip). ive been avoiding the endpapers as ive been sick and didnt want to cover them in whatever i'm coughing out, but they are sooo close to done.
i have lots and lots of ceramics fo's to post but with it being so dreary out i havent been able to get some good pictures, so hopefully soon!

Death, it always comes too soon

2007-12-02T21:05:00.000-05:00

The first fish I ever caught, with Grampa's help of course.

Well since I've spent most of the day crying anyway, I may as well write the post that's going to make me cry. Today my sister called me, and I could tell she had been crying. My first thought was that something happened between her and her fiance. But then she said "Grampa died this morning." I will forever remember this day as the first time I truly knew loss and grief.
I have counted myself lucky that though they are not always in the best of health, and though there have been some close calls, every family member that I have been close to was still with me except for my great gramma. But when she passed in 2004 she was 101, and we were prepared for her passing as she had been ill for some time. We had time to make peace and say goodbye. I couldnt make the funeral because it was in the middle of finals at college but my family told me it was a more happy occasion, a celebration of her life, for she had lived a long and full life, one worthy of celebration. This time its not such a happy occasion. This was too sudden. Even though his health had been declining for a couple of years he wasnt that ill, just old. I know that everyone must die but that doesnt make it any easier when its your own granpa. He was a wonderful man and I will miss him terribly. He liked to tell jokes and make people smile. He liked to buy everyone gag gifts at Christmas. Or silly games that we could all play. He was a fisherman. He was a war veteran. He was "Chuck the Windspinner Man."

When I called him to wish him a happy birthday last year he asked me how the rats were (I work with mice), how the research was going, and if I got along with my roommates. He told me that he thought my sister was too young to be thinking about marriage and how happy he was that I'd chosen to live a life on my own before I settled down. He told me to see the world, have a career and "sow my wild oates" before I got married. When I laughed that that was strange advice for a grandfather to give a granddaughter he brushed it off and said it was true, I would live a longer life than I ever expected and I didnt want to get to an age where I regretted not doing all the exciting things when I was young. The fact that he not only supported my decisions but encouraged them at a time when most of my relatives were asking me when I was going to "find a nice guy and settle down" meant everything to me.

This Christmas is going to be so hard without him. I didnt go home for thanksgiving and I had looked forward to seeing him at Christmas. I am so incredibly sad. I know in time it will get easier... But right now this pain in my gut, this knot in my throat, reminding me that something I loved has been lost forever, is horrible. Right now I hate that I am alone in Boston. I'll be taking a red-eye flight to Chicago on weds and back to Boston saturday, but before then I have to present my research at our yearly Gates Foundation meeting and I just hope I can muster enough concentration to get through the day on tuesday.
This week will be rough but I know I'll get through it somehow. Also, thanks to everyone who has already sent me good wishes of love and support - it means a lot.

Grampa, me, my sister, and my dad at Six Flags.

When you are stressed

2007-12-02T00:59:00.001-05:00

You get this (on the right):

instead of the five pointed one on the left. I worked on that "lace triangle" this past week, which was a particularly stressful one at work and i just had to laugh tonight when i finally bound it off and realized what it was. its even more funny since i tried so hard to make it right. i kept miscounting stitches and ripping back and starting over. oh well.

at least i had the arrival of some yarny goodness to help. (yes the stash has grown!! gah!)

Here we have some Socks That Rock from Blue Moon Fiber Arts in the new Raven series.
This is Grawk. isn't she beautiful?

And this is Tlingit.
I'm sad to say that I'm a little disappointed in Tlingit, she seems just like a muted Grawk. I had contemplated getting Rook-y instead, but its so hard to guess true color from the computer. So I didnt. And I wish I had. Ariel got a skein of Rook-y and I was very jealous. Ah well.

I love Grawk though so that makes me happy.
(:{

only 54%??

2007-11-29T09:30:00.000-05:00

Man I have a long ways to go in seeing all these states. and there are a couple (Colorado, Nebraska) that I was in when I was 2, so I dont remember and I'd like to return. Totally stole this idea from Amanda via Ariel! Now its back to work for me!

create your own personalized map of the USA
or check out ourCalifornia travel guide

(mostly) FO's

2007-11-24T22:47:00.000-05:00

I've been in a little bit of a knitting rut lately. Don't tell the secret spook endpaper's but it's all their fault. So I decided to stop stressing about the mitts and to devote some time learning to spindle. I stumbled upon this wonderful website while at work which answered a lot of questions I had. After the spindle began to wobble with all the spun alpaca goodness on it I wound up my first ball. Then onto the next. I used the same fiber - more alpaca cream colored. This time, after the first couple inches, I did a much better job of keeping the fiber the same thickness. Though, I still do better with the park and draft method, mostly cuz I cant keep the darned thing from spinning in the opposite direction and undoing all I've done. I also think I'm still spinning thicker than the spindle can handle b/c it wasnt long before it was wobbling again. So I wound up my second single ball.

Here I am winding up the second single. Using a little ceramic cup I made this past summer works perfect to hold the spindle while I wind. Notice the even thickness!!

Here are my first two singles. The one on the left is the very first - you can see all the varying thicknesses. The one on the right is much better except for that first couple inches when I started it - thats on the top right of the ball.
I think I'll have to get a heavier spindle to ply the yarn. I'm considering using a suggestion I saw on the Ravelry boards and plying it w/ colored thread so that it doesnt get super thick. But that's for later, first I'll do some more spindling practice.

Onto (nearly) FO 2!
Finally started some holiday knitting. Here is the beginning of my lace snowflake star ornament. The Emily Oaker cast on took several tries and I'm still not comfortable with it, so I may eventually switch to another method.

It knit up super quick though, so that's good.
This is what it looked like when I went to bed last night after 1 hour of work.

And here we are tonight after only 2 hours work. It's almost all done! It just needs to be starched. Despite the icky beginning - its not even easy to knit off of the EO cast-on, I like the pattern and am hoping to make roughly 40 of them by x-mas to give away as ornaments to my family. Wish me luck! (thankfully (or not!) I'll have quite a bit of boredom time to knit once I get to the parents house on dec 20th).

stash

2007-11-23T18:04:00.000-05:00

if i were a lol-cat i would be saying "i can has a stash?"

i'm in the process of uploading all the pics i took today of stash bin #1 (since its so rare i see the sun - it was out today!) and then i'll get them into Ravelry. its funny b/c as i was pulling out the yarn from the bin i was thinking: gift, free-bee, gift, free-bee, etc. I think there were only a couple of skeins of yarn i actually bought myself! it still manages to multiply in the night though, so i've decided due to my budgetary constraints to try and knit from my stash as much as possible in the next several months which means that i might actually *gasp* attempt socks again. but first the christmas knitting must begin.....

Drop Spindle Fun

2007-11-19T21:08:00.000-05:00

Uh oh, a New crafty/fiber endeavor!
So my new fascination with spindling started when Amanda started talking about getting her FIL to make her a spindle. I didnt know what it was and she directed me to this very helpful knitty article. I thought they were super cute and was intrigued. THEN I saw a girl on the 66 bus spindling while riding the bus! (clearly, it was a sign from the fiber goddess) And it looked super fun. When the lot of us went to Rhinebeck I looked at all the pretty spindles, but I wasnt sure which one would be right for me. I also know nothing about roving, so I didnt buy any fiber. I found a Golding drop spindle starter kit near the end of the day but it was a large portion of my budget, and I had already spent most of it on yarn. Lucky for me Danielle mentioned that she had several spindles she could loan me if I wanted to try it out AND she had some alpaca roving she'd be willing to give to me since she's allergic. Yay! Sadly, I havent seen Danielle since Rhinebeck, but she saw Catherine last weekend and then I saw Catherine tonight for some random knitting.
I was all excited to get the spindle and fiber before the holiday weekend and boy was I ever pleasantly surprised. I hit the fiber jackpot! I was expecting one bag of alpaca, not a bunch! And in so many colors! There's creme, black, solid grey, brown, and brown and creme heather!
After a quick tutorial from Ariel, I was off and running. Well, kinda. I'm not very good and my end product is all different thicknesses, but I'm sure I'll get better with practice.

Look at all that fiber goodness!
Thanks Danielle!!

Here is a real live alpaca at Rhinebeck. Cute!

This one was a prize winner and a bit of a prima donna - she didnt want to look at anyone!

I'm not super worried that I'll give up knitting or stop buying yarn or even blow all my monies on a wheel because I'm not really interested in making my own yarn. I just like spindling for the novelty of it. Its tiny, portable, and cute. Another technique for me to master (its my thing, I like trying new techniques (in lots of disciplines), mastering them, and then moving on - keeps my brain hopping!) and maybe a little fun side hobby if I get any good at it. Because I have soo much extra time that I can now add side hobbies you know (;{ Maybe I'll get lucky and someday even have a beautiful little spindle to call my own, even if I never get into it as much as knitting they are ever so cute! And it kinda gives me street cred in the gansta fiber life. Just kidding!
I'm so excited I've nearly forgotten that my little sister got engaged (she's 22. they've been dating ~7 mos) and I'm in the wedding but clearly not important enough to her for her to tell me before she told all the rest of the family and her friends and even started checking out reception venues for the past two weeks. Yeah. Ouch. And now that my mom has an official almost grandson to be she has no need of me. Which is clearly why she doesnt call anymore and is too busy to talk to me when I call. Anyway, lets just move right along b/c its obvious that that is a sore spot right now.

Alpaca fiber saves the day!

Secret Spook

2007-11-18T11:04:00.000-05:00

I know its been awhile since the yarners and I actually exchanged for Secret Spook, and I should have posted this ages ago, but in my defense, Amanda and Cathy havent posted yet about this either!!

So we decided to exchange at Bertucci's on a Sunday evening. Here I am with the first thing I pulled out of my goodie bag: a DNA model! Look how delighted and surprised I was! Oh, and my Spook was Catherine! (there's nothing here about the gift I gave Alexis b/c her knitted item is still not finished. I got in a bit over my head.)

Here is a round-up of the rest of the loot!. Cupcake and crossbones crochet pot-holders, gothtini glass and sugar skullies, a voo-doo doll key chain, a flesh-eating bacteria!, handmade cloth bags with bats and moons!, stickers, a pendant, and a blue glass hangy w/ a bat on it.
Thanks Catherine!

Here is a close up of the knitted DNA model! I brought it to work to show it to all the scientists and they were amazed and jealous!

Here is a close up of the gothtini (it had chocolate in it, I ate it all) and the Day of the Dead sugar skullies. What a neat idea - to incorporate other dead themed holidays!

Finally, here is my little flesh eating bacteria (Streptococcus pyogenes) at home with his pals ulcer (Helicobacter pylori) and kissing disease (mononucleosis or Epstein Barr virus). I love my giant microbes! As a side note, Alexis gave me the Epstein Barr for Secret Cupid, I just didnt have a blog then. And a friend from college gave me an ulcer for my birthday- she said that she hoped if she gave one to me it could somehow be a talisman to prevent me from giving one to myself (I was not surprisingly stressed about finals at the time).

real life injects itself into crafters blog

2007-11-16T16:47:00.000-05:00

I know as of late there have been more non-crafty posts than crafty ones, and I promise soon to put up my Secret Spook goodies, some FO ceramics, and some knitting and crocheting WIP's but right now i need to talk about something else.
Today at work I've gotten absolutely nothing done. Well, ok, I made 3 graphs. But mostly I've just been sitting here staring out into space wishing to feel better. I know I should probably just go home and curl up in a ball and watch tv, but I dont want to. I want to be normal and feel normal again. I dont think I'm making any sense. Maybe I should explain. This is day 3 of Byetta injections. After three years of tinkering, hoping, tinkering more, and crossing fingers my endocrinologist and I have come to the conclusion that metformin just isnt adequate. Its not doing it for me. And so on to other meds. Since I've already tried so many different diabetes meds there were few options left. After months of researching on my part I made the decision to try Byetta again. I've been on it before and had success until my life got whacky while studying for the MCAT's and i stopped exercising and eating properly. So I knew what to expect. I knew the first month is hell. But it doesnt make it any easier. The nausea is overwhelming. The space-cadetness is overwhelming. Eating ginger helps with the nausea. But I have yet to find a remedy for this foggy-headed dream land I'm in. I dont remember this being part of the slew of side effects I encountered the first time I tried Byetta, so maybe it goes away relatively quickly. I hope. The worst part is I cant even concentrate long enough to knit!
Right now I'm trying to stay focused on the positives that I remember (decreased appetite, weight loss, less sore-ness and tired-ness and fatigue during workouts, better sugar control, better A1c).
All this baloney of having stupid type 2 diabetes as a youngin really just sucks. thank you genetics.
Anyhow I'm done w/ my rambling complaint. Will return to regularly scheduled craftyness soon. I hope.

horrified

2007-11-06T00:00:00.001-05:00

oh my goodness gracious me.
so i was browsing blogs and came upon one that was positively reviewing this book. i know its probably the 20-something me speaking but if i ever end up a drunk, divorced, crazy knitting cat lady PLEASE kill me. or send me to a home. for crazies. seriously. now i'm going to go to bed and have nightmares. and no i dont care if i am being insensitive for not celebrating the wonderfulness of some lady whose "found herself" in knitting. its like all born again religions: gag inducing.

Follower

2007-11-05T23:21:00.001-05:00

Well since lots of people are posting their oldest picture of themselves for blogstalker on knitty, I got jealous and had to join in.
These are the oldest pictures I have of myself (of course there exist older ones, they just arent in my possession). These are from my first birthday.
Maybe if ya'll are lucky I'll post some wips for wip weds this week.

Transporting a giant cake to work: a tutorial

2007-10-31T23:12:00.001-04:00

Have you ever spent 6 hours making the most absolutely delicious Chocolate Stout Cake Ever for a work going away party only to realize you have no round tupperware cake transporter thingie, and in fact have no tall cake holder whatsoever? And how the heck are you going to bring this wonderfully frosted yummy all the way to work? Well, have no fear I have figured it out! And I am here to share my wisdom with you.

Step 1: Bake and frost super yummy 3-layer cake

Step 2: measure lots of plastic containers/drawers until you find a suitable one.

Step 3: dump said drawer's belongings into a paper bag. Wash plastic drawer vigorously.

Step 4: Put cake on plate in plastic drawer.

Step 5: plastic wrap the heck out of it.

Step 6: Bring onto bus and endure strange looks.

Step 7: bring to work, cut, and enjoy.

As a side note: this cake was Really heavy. It tasted unbelievably amazing, but is not fun to carry. In the future, I will not make such heavy cakes for work and may even buy myself one of those plastic cake transporter thingies. Maybe.
Also I used Samuel Smiths Oatmeal Stout; less butter; less sugar overall; and some brown sugar for the cake. The frosting was a pound of Trader Joe's Belgian Bittersweet and heavy cream.

Meme's

2007-10-25T12:39:00.000-04:00

So I was tagged for an 8 Random things meme, but honestly, i think that all of my randomness has been discussed in previous posts, memes, or blog challenges. So instead of the random meme, I'm choosing to do the Halloweenie Meme, also on Amanda's blog. If you want to be tagged for this, consider yourself tagged. And why not? Halloween is such fun (:{

1. Do you believe in ghosts?
Most of the time, yes.

2. Have you ever seen a ghost?
Not exactly, though I've often caught glimpses of things that could not be explained.

3. Have you ever experienced something that is best described by the word "paranormal"?
I cant think of any specific instances right now but I have had "weird feelings" where you just Know something is amiss.

4. Do you watch any ghost or haunting themed shows?
I used to watch X-Files religiously when it was on. Its still my favourite show (minus the last season). Occasionally I'll catch a ghost show on the History channel or A&E or something like that. I Love scary movies and ghost stories though. As a kid my favourite books were the Scary Stories series by Alvin Schwartz (I received the set a couple yrs ago as a gift wheee!), and as a teen I devoured books by Stephen King, John Saul, Dean Koontz, etc.

5. If so, do you sometimes sleep with the lights on or wake up your partner because the show scared you a whole lot and you cant sleep and you dont want to be awake alone?
Well, I think this question is awfully presumptuous. I dont have a partner. Sadly, I sleep alone. Thanks for rubbing it in. Anyway..... I dont like lights when I sleep. In fact if its not pitch black or close to it I put something over my eyes. I've def stayed up late on the internet "calming down" after a scary movie though.

6. Have you ever been to a haunted place? Did you experience anything spooky?
I've been to several "haunted houses" (the real kind, not the carnival kind), and as a teen used to go with friends to "haunted graveyards" (Resurrection Cemetery, Bachelors Grove, IL). Never experienced anything spooky.
My high school however, thats a whole diff story. I was on student council and every year we put on a Haunted High. It was usually the weekend before Halloween b/c we always had that Monday off for a teacher's institute. So every yr we would take over the South Bldg (the oldest portion of the school) on the friday night and spend the whole night setting up, leave for a 4 hour nap sat, then be back for business sat and sun night. All day sun night on to mon morning was cleanup time. Over the yrs "spooky" things happened to many people. For instance, hearing childrens voices where there was no one. Leaving an empty room after it had been tarped and going right back in it mins later and having the tarp all be ripped down (theres a big difference in the way a tarp looks when it just falls as opposed to being forcefully ripped). Also, my first yr, I asked why we only used 3/4 of the south bldg (its a square) and was told "we're not allowed to use that section" I later found out that the janitors refused to clean that section after midnight. why? that section apparently had a "mad" male spirit who liked to throw desks and chalk, rearrange furniture, and dump out flower pots. not even the janitor's dog would go in that section. During my sr yr a bunch of the seniors got to talking to the old-timer janitors and we told them about the children's voices (I had never heard them, but many had). They said they knew those voices well. the kids (a boy and a girl) liked to play in the glass staircase and in the courtyard. they were nice and completely un-like the angry male spirit. the janitors believe that they are the spirits of the kids who died in the fire of the farm house located behind the school grounds. our school acquired the land from the farmers family in the 1960's after the fire.
Everyone who has spent a good amount of time late at night at that school has had similar experiences. There were instances where I Felt odd, but I personally never heard or saw anything.
My mom's friend's son was also saved from a nasty fall down the stairs by a ghost, but thats a long story as well. We'll keep that for another day.

7. How much do you love Halloween?
SO MUCH!!!! Its my favourite holiday!!

mayday!

2007-10-23T23:19:00.000-04:00

So, Ive never had a problem using hair dyes from the grocery store and doing it myself. It's always turned out great. I've been dying my hair every winter for over 5 years.
Today was different.
I look hideous.
I'm so embarrassed. I look like a hooker from moulin rouge
I think i may actually have to go to cvs tomorrow and buy black b/c that's the only thing i can think of that will cover this up.
):{

It was supposed to be "Egyptian Plum" or, purple black. Instead I get crazy cheap horrible trashy fire engine red with a hint of purple. around my scalp at my hairline on my forehead my hair is lighter and finer and it is some awful orange-red-pink-fake color i never knew existed. arrrghhhh.

Rhinebeck! Re-cap

2007-10-21T20:17:00.000-04:00

Well I've been super busy with the med school apps but this weekend I took a (much needed) mental break and went to the New York State Sheep and Wool Festival in Rhinebeck, NY (Hudson River Valley area). It was soo much fun!!
Friday night Amanda came up from DC and her, Catherine's friend Danielle, and I all spent the night at Catherine's. BEFORE the crack of dawn (5:30 am to be exact) Alexis met us and we began our journey down to Rhinebeck!

Here is a picture of the fog rolling over the Berkshires right after the sun came up. It was a beautiful drive!

Yay Rhinebeck! All the buildings were 4H barns. I thought they were cute.

Of course there were animals at the Festival!

And here are Catherine and Daniele doing what knitters love to do: fondle yarn! How could we not when the sign instructed us to?

Here is a neat sky picture of the motel. I actually ended up over at the Super 8 with Amanda and Alexis, but originally I was at this one with Catherine, Daniele, and Ariel.

Here is the view from the Skytop Motel: Gorgeous!!

Catherine and Daniele goofing around.

Pretty!

More pretty!

Neato view from the ride home from Rhinebeck.

And of course my goodie take home!
There is a hand woven basket for my mom for Christmas (dont tell her!)
Some pretty leaves that followed me home and yarny goodness.
Clockwise:
At the top is a promo skein from Dani of Sunshine Yarns in the color Plume.
Then some gorgeous marino/tencel Sea Pearl from briar rose fibers. The other four skeins are all Acero (wool/silk/viscose) from Brooks Farm Yarns.

Here is a close-up of my favourites. The sea pearl from Briar Rose was my very first "must have" of the day. Its a variegated black, purple, green, and turquise. The other two are must haves from Brooks Farm. One is variegated green and the other is a midnight colorway (purple, black, royal and navy blue). Love!!

Last but not least some buttons and pendants. The pendants came from the gem festival that was also happeneing on the fair grounds.

And the beautiful hand made ceramic buttons I found at the Briar Rose tent.

After the crazyness all day sat we needed a nap before we headed over to the Ravelry party. Goodtimes! Met a bunch of people- and of course only remember half the names - if that. But oh what a day!
On the way home from Rhinebeck! we stopped in Lenox, MA to check out Colorful Stitches. Lenox and Lee MA are beautiful and quaint little New England towns. I didnt buy any yarn at Colorful Stitches b/c I was just totally yarn'ed out (I know - how is that possible?).
Sigh. I'm so tired now but sooo happy!
Sorry for the lack of fantastical pictures, I was just too busy having fun!!

touch me up

2007-09-26T23:14:00.001-04:00

Stop it right now and get that dirty thought out of your mind!

I'm talking about my tattoo here.

So, what have I been doing besides writing med school application essays? And secret knitting? Why, I went and got my tribal moth tattoo touched up.
This time it went much better than the original fill in. Andrew was excited to see me; apparently I looked so bad after the fill in he was afraid I'd never come back for the touch up. I felt like having an Alicia Silverstone moment: As If! He also asked around to see how he could make it easier on me (isnt that sweet?) and said that this time he'd have me laying down instead of sitting up. I have selective memory (otherwise I would never go back and get more pain) and so I couldn't say right away whether it was easier but he could tell it was better for me. And in the end I could tell too. He decided to do a complete second coat rather than spot touch-ups since then it would look more even (like I said - perfectionist) and I was fine with that since I'd already paid for the tattoo, all the touch-ups are free (bonus of going to an awesome studio is that the artists guarantee their work - it may cost more up front, but in the end you save). When we were done he took some pictures - I'm going to be semi-famous! Well, ok, I'll be in his book. And maybe if I'm lucky on the studio's website.

So here I am laying down and looking not so bad.

Then he made me sit up to do the finishing touches on my shoulders. And all sorts of funny faces came out.

Both Andreas and Andrew had a good laugh at my faces.

I'm glad its over, but of course I'm already planning my next one! Too bad I'm super poor from application fees..... Ah well. It can wait. I have this one to tide me over for a while (:{

Mr. Coronavirus

2007-09-21T13:03:00.000-04:00

So while back I won a contest on Catherine's blog and my prize was a sock monkey and a crochet fan bookmark. She let me pick out the socks for my monkey by taking a picture of all her socks and then i picked one. I ended up picking one that looked like it was blue socks with polka dots on it, but when I actually saw the monkey in person there was a pleasant surprise. The "polka dots" look like coronaviruses!! Wheee! I was super excited about that so that's what I named him.

Observe here the circle with the little peg-like things on the outside.

There are two more.

Here is a textbook illustration of a coronavirus and a scanning electron microscope picture of actual coronavirus particles. See the similarity!??
Pretty sweet huh

And here are the pictures of the full size Mr. Coronavirus and the little crochet fan bookmark. The book mark is very pretty! I would also like to point out that this is the first stuffed animal I have received since I was roughly 10 years old. So when I got home I excitedly showed him to my roommates. Yay fun! Thanks Catherine!!

FO: Luna Moth Shawl

2007-09-19T21:39:00.000-04:00

ok folks, here it finally is the finished shawl!
It was a wonderful pattern and it only took me a month. Super easy too. The pattern is very intuitive after awhile so its not too difficult for first-timers. The yarn is great as well, wearing it is super nice (though it is a little slippery on bare skin).
I tried for probably 30 minutes to get a good picture of the whole thing, but its just too big! So you'll have to make do with some detail pictures instead.

Here is a picture of me at the wedding from the back.

This is the front, me and my brother's girlfriend Olivia.

Look, its so big it spans my full size bed!

Pretty details!

I must say, for my first giant lace project it came out very nice. Though the blocking was a beast. I hate blocking. Let us just not go into that......
The rest of the yarny and patterny details are up on Ravelry (username Grateblue2 just in case). (and if you are a knitter and havent heard, join Ravelry!) (details not repeated here b/c I'm a lazy bastard)

this day

2007-09-11T14:39:00.000-04:00

I promise to post pictures of the finished shawl soon, but for today I wanted to post this instead.

I'm sure I don't have to tell anyone that today is the 6th anniversary of the attacks on the WTC in NYC and the Pentagon. Lets forget the politics of today and remember that many people perished. And pause, and be thankful that we are still alive and have the luxury to forget this horrible tragedy the other 364 days of the year.

On another sad note, Alex, the famous African grey parrot of Irene Pepperberg died last week (but it was just announced in the news today). This one parrot changed the perspective of the science of the mind over the last 30 years. Incredible. Cheers to you mate.

Also, Ebola has resurfaced again in DR Congo, so if you can, try to not travel there for awhile.

Weds Blog Challenge: Remembering

2007-09-05T11:28:00.001-04:00

Well hello again! I've been on vacation in Illinois and Indiana, but I'm back now. I have lots of catching up to do, I know. The Luna Moth Shawl is done, and 2 other wip's are almost done. I'll post picts soon, I promise. Since I was on vaca I missed last week's blog challenge, but I thought it was a good one so I'm going to use it for this week.

The question is: What do you want to be remembered for?
Here's Amanda's answer for reference (:{

I think this is a toughie, and I agree w/ Amanda, a little morbid. But a good challenge, nonetheless.
My fear here is that I'll be remembered the way my family chooses to see me and not how I am as an adult here in Boston. Every time I go home I am painfully reminded of how they refuse to accept me as I am now, a happy, balanced, grounded adult ( I'm not just saying this b/c I think its true, I've been told this by many co-workers and my pre-med adviser who's known me for 7 yrs); instead my family chooses to see me as the way I was as a teenager, moody, quick tempered, book-smart but common sense dumb, a bad driver, in my own little dream world, etc. This is also why they refuse to call me by my birth name, Cassandra, and insist on calling me by their nick-name, Cassie. And also why it pains me so to hear people calling me Cassie, it reminds me of that person that I left behind in Orland Park 7 years ago. So my hope is that if I die, all of my Boston friends and colleagues will make sure that they remember me as the person they know me as, not as the person my family will insist I am. Please? (Also, while we are on the subject, I want to be cremated and my ashes thrown in the ocean. Or some other environmentally sustainable disposal)

Anyhow, on to the question.
Well, I would like to be remembered for being goofy, quirky, quick to laugh, a book/science nerd but also social and fun to have around. A person who sticks to her guns on the important stuff (like values), opinionated and not afraid to argue but also not afraid to grow and change positions with new information. A loyal friend. A lover of all good food, good wine, and good beer. A staunch environmentalist who deeply cares for our planet and its creatures. An artist and a knitter. A little bit of a dirty and demented mind, but not in a scary way. Willing to try just about anything once and game for adventure.
Fell free to completely quote that paragraph in my obituary (:{
I think that is about it??

Tattoo Odyssey

2007-08-19T17:36:00.002-04:00

So to start out this post I thought I'd give you a little list so you could better understand my journey to this point of ginourmous tattoo on my back. Then its time for the good stuff: the pictures!

Stages of getting a tattoo:
I really really want this............................... 1 year
Do I really want this?.................................. 1 month
Hey I got a tax bonus! I want a tattoo!
Now! ............................................................. 1 week
Yay I have an appointment!
In 1 month ):{ ......................................... 1 month
Outline:
Ow this kinda hurts! .................................. 1.5 hours
Hey this kinda itches! ................................ 2 days
and its peeling! black bits! ........................ 2 days
Oh look, all better
Fill in:
Ow this kinda hurts! ................................. 30 mins
No, this Really HURTS! ........................... 2 hours
Yuck this feels like a bad sunburn .......... 5 days
Hey this itches! Itches like hell! ............. 2 days
(overlaps with the pain -- how is that possible??)
OK, enough of this, it still itches ............. 2 days
and its peeling! lots of black bits! ........... 4 days
(overlaps with itching)
Finally, I think its healed ........................ 8 days post fill in session

And for those who think that the fill in is less pain than the outline, I can assure you its not true. 2.5 hours of pure pain cannot even compare to the the outline. I'm now convinced that I could probably handle getting shot (note: I do NOT want to though) and childbirth. At least then they could give you pain meds. There were no pain meds involved in this b/c most of them thin your blood. Which makes you Bleed. Bleeding is not good b/c then your skin wont absorb the ink and you'll have to go back for more touch-ups. As it is having an all black tattoo requires a minimum of 1 touch-up session. Joy. BUT it was all def worth it. I think it looks amazing and I love it.
And now, for the fun stuff. Pictures.

First, the Outline.
Here is the "Before" shot with my crappy little blobby dolphin tattoo. (Yes, the picture is in focus, the tattoo is not though)

Cool mirror shot
Making the "ouch" face
Looking oddly serene
Halfway through the outline

Close-up of the outline in progress

Outline is done. All bandaged up and ready to go. (Yes that is blood).

Here is the finished outline before the peeling began. The ointment makes it shiny.

And now the Fill In

Close up of red swollen -ness

At this point, I made him take a break b/c I was feeling woozy and needed a snack. So Ariel snapped a picture.
Here I am thinking its all done (b/c he cleaned it) but not wanting to get up b/c of the pain.
There are no pictures of him touching up spots while I was standing. Trust me that is was intense and horrible.

And here is the final picture after all the itching and peeling.
Taa-daaa!

Its beautiful. Well, I think so anyway and that's what matters since its my back. (:{
I have to say throughout it all my artist, Andrew, was a class act. A perfectionist through and through. Everyone that I dealt with at Fat Ram's Pumpkin Tattoo over in Jamaica Plain was great and I would definitely recommend that studio, and of course my artist, Andrew, to anyone. If you are like me and dont want to wait a year to get in to see the famous owner, Ram himself, then go see Andrew. His custom work is great as well. He also didn't freak out when I decided after the outline that I wanted to tweak parts of the design. Its going to be on my back for the rest of my life so of course he wants me to be happy with it.
Well now this has become a super long post, so I think its time to end it. There may be more about this in a couple months after the required touch-up. And I can assure you I am not looking forward to that. But, it must be done.
Edit: in case anyone is wondering, its a tribal design based off of the luna moth

Weds Blog Challenge: Fav Things

2007-08-16T13:25:00.000-04:00

Yesterday's Blog Challenge was a list of your favourite things, Oprah Style. As in, things that people could actually go out and buy not metaphorical things or people. So here it is.

1. Creative Zen V Plus 8gb player. This little guy is amazing! Its about the size of 2 books of matches and its a beast. Fits in my pocket, has loads of great features, great music quality, can handle my clumsy life, all around winner.

2. Peanut Butter. Trader Joes and Nature Promise (Stop and Shop organic brand) are my two winners. Both are just peanuts so no migraines from preservatives for me. And they taste great. Considering PB has been my lunch of choice for almost 20 years I honestly couldn't live w/out these two products!

3. Issey Miyake L'eau D'Issey Eau de parfum for women. Doesn't give me migraines -- which is huge considering soooo many perfumes do. And it matches my chemistry and smells great on me. Its understated too, wont overpower the sense of smell of those standing near me.

4. Oil of Olay Sensitive daily moisturizer. My mother uses this so I've always used it too. For awhile I tried other stuff just to make sure and always keep coming back to this. Its a perfect light moisturizer that doesn't make me break out.

5. Yarn. Yes, its low on the list. Too bad. (:{ I still love it.

6. DVR. Sad, I know. But I have to admit that being able to record shows and watching them at a later time is amazing. No more do I have to worry about making it home on time. And I dont have to watch commercials either. And being able to pause live tv to use the bathroom or see instant replays of things i missed is awesome too.

7. Asics running shoes. Simply the best. Ever. The end.

8. Teva sandals in the summer and my Naot black boots in the winter.

9. My digital camera: Cannon Powershot SD700 IS Digital Elph. Love it. Maybe too much.

10. National Geographic Magazine. I dont get to read it as often as I would like but even getting it just to look at the amazing pictures makes me happy. Every month. So wonderful.

And I think I'll end it there. Ten is a good number. Besides, If I keep going its not really a list of favourites anymore, just stuff I like. (:{

Stay tuned: next time: my tattoo odyssey. I promise!

Since I've Been Gone 2: FO: Ceramics

2007-08-13T21:30:00.001-04:00

Ok, well since I couldn't get these pictures or this post to look anything like I wanted to I'm just going to do it this way.
Pretty annoyed at this point and so I think I'll skip the drawn out commentary. I'll just say that the top 8 pictures are from a soda fire and the bottom 5 are from a reduction kiln. Several of the glazes are the same, they just come out looking different on different stoneware types (I use both brown and white stoneware) and different positions in the kilns also give different effects for the same glaze. I'm not very happy with the results of the soda fire, luckily there is another one at the end of this week so I can redeem myself. I am however, very happy with the glaze results of the reduction kiln. Especially since reduction kilns can be so unpredictable.